Blows that don’t break your back, make them stronger
February 25, 2013
First Published: 16:06 IST(25/2/2013)
Last Updated: 17:00 IST(25/2/2013)
And I’ll give you some relief…. err… that is, provided, I’m not doing a headstand at the time.
Famous as a stand-up comedian and prankster, TV host Cyrus Broacha turns to action.
I am 18 and I have been committed to a girl for the last two years. We used fight regularly, but we never broke up. The last time we argued, I didn’t speak to her for four days because
she lied to me. Eventually, when I did try and call her, she told she was committed to someone else. I love her a lot and want her back. I think she has a soft
corner for me. What do I do?
Mao Tse Tang once said, “Blows that don’t break your back, make them stronger.” And this, he said after his third wife ran him over with a truck breaking almost all his spinal vertebrae. So he should know. He spent the next few years of his life in close proximity to his shoe laces. So previously your fights were fine, but this incident seems to have broken your back or rather her back, depending on whosoever one is back. Has she really found someone? Or is she trying to teach you a lesson? I think you need to investigate this case and find out if there is someone else in her life.
A few years ago, I met a schoolmate after a long time. Last year, he asked me out. But I told him I wasn’t ready to commit. Everything was fine for a while after that, but a few months ago, he started ignoring me. He didn’t even respond to my final goodbye message. I miss him and want him back. It’s been three months. Do you think he still has feelings for me?
Typical Stranger, typical. This is what happens when people say one thing and mean something else. I say you send him a message saying you’d like to meet him and start all over again. One text, that’s all. If you don’t get a reply, cut the cord immediately. If he brushes you off, tell him you always mean the opposite of what you say in any case. First you said no, when you meant yes. Now, you’re saying yes, when you actually mean to say no. All men suffer from an inherent paranoia — that women are and always will be unreadable. Oh, and by the way, how do you think I got married, huh?
Last year, I fell in love with a married man, who is 10 years older than I am. I had never been so happy in my life. But then I decided to break up with him because he couldn’t leave his wife. I don’t want to live like the ‘other woman’. And I know he won’t have a problem leaving me. How do I get him out of my head?
Rosa, there are three ways: 1) Do a headstand, 2) Hypnosis and 3) The surest way is to attempt hypnosis while doing a headstand. Don’t worry, as the brook once said, “Men will come and men will go, but I go on forever.” Break all contact and then watch two old episodes of Bigg Boss. That show is so bad that it’ll leave a worse taste in your mouth than your break-up has. And go get yourself a nice single man, but hurry there are only three such men left in the world (offer open until Holi or stocks last).
I was in a relationship, but we broke up after three years because my boyfriend was cheating on me. He is my only close friend and he knows that I still love him. But he says he’s scared to get close to me again as he has a girlfriend. I can’t just be friends; it’s too tough.
Why confused? If you are happy playing the second fiddle, then go ahead. See how upfront he’s being. It’s a straight offer; treat it like a business proposal and accept or reject it. If I was him, I’d love keeping more potential ‘friends’ in the locker. If I were you, I’d leave him completely, but then, if I were you, I’d also only wear shorts. I’d never share and I’d never eat beetroot too. So better you be you and decide.