Blame it on love

  • PTI
  • |
  • Updated: Oct 24, 2002 14:52 IST

I belong to a family where we had the best of both the worlds - my mother's Hindu Bengali roots and my father's Sikh descent. But would you believe it, they never ever forced their faith onto us. I must have been to the gurudwara just once in my entire lifespan so far. Having studied in a convent school, I have gone through the Catholic rituals in the church too. Therefore as a child, my upbringing has been very cosmopolitan. We used to celebrate all the festivals with equal fervour. And then as I grew up I fell in love with somebody from another community - my husband Fahd is a Muslim. I guess I have come a full circle.

Why it's important to know what my background is because I find misery and apathy for the other person everywhere in the present India that we live in. Believe me, my childhood has been the most beautiful one and I have never been superstitious in my life. But with changing social conditions and people becoming less tolerant of other people's ideologies, I have been forced to become superstitious to some extent. Also, I believe that as one grows older, one tends to look at ordinary things in a different light. My views on life and the surrounding myths have undergone drastic changes too. I am no longer the happy-go-lucky person I used to be. I attach importance to things I would sidestep earlier.

It's my lack of self-confidence that is to be blamed. The first step towards such an insecurity is that one starts dreading disasters and there is a sense of fear that envelops us for the loved ones. It's the other way around - instead of becoming more logical in our approach, we have a propensity to be more emotional as age advances. And that's what has made me worry so much. Subsequently, I end up believing in some utterly laughable and absurd beliefs.

I still call myself intelligent with a high level of IQ because I am aware of everything around me and read voraciously. But if I were to be dubbed a follower of  nonsensical traditions, I would most definitely oppose it. I would defend myself with the plea that when one is in love, God makes us do weird things, and that includes following some myths about life too.


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