You’ve been in a relationship for five years now. One bright, sunny morning your boyfriend pops the question. Oh oh… panic attack! Are you one of those who feel a tingle of doubt every time you think of taking your relationship to the next level? You’re not alone.
Deepika Padukone plays a commitment phobic Aaliya Khan, in
Break Ke Baad
that releases this Friday. She portrays the role of a self assured, ambitious woman, who fails to value relationships in her life. As Aaliya, she is sometimes even selfish and stubborn, but Deepika is not. She says. “I’m completely the opposite of Aaliya in real life. I had to step out my comfort zone to enact the character. Aaliya is extremely ambitious, even ready to sacrifice relationships. I believe that when one is in a relationship, one should try to make it work or move on. I’m all for relationships and definitely not commitment phobic.”
Many feel it varies from person to person. Actor Yuvika Chaudhary says, “Nobody forces you to be in a relationship, so it’s your own choice really.” But television actor Aashka Goradia feels that women are more comfortable expressing their individuality now, and hence arises the need to think twice about getting serious about relationships. Actor Arzoo Govitrikar, on the other hand, feels that women have just realised that they have to be practical. “The independence we have today makes us think before taking a leap,” she says. Dr Gayatri Bala Subramanian, a city psychologist, echoes the sentiment: “I wouldn’t say women are commitment phobic, but they are realising their choices. And that’s a positive move because it’s an empowering feeling for a woman.”
Padukone feels that it ultimately boils down to one’s priorities. “Working women are economically independent, changing their viewpoint on commitment. But to each his own. More than your career, it’s about the kind of person you are,” she says, adding that it’s difficult to come up with universal solutions when it comes to relationships. “Whether it’s a man who is dominating, or a woman who thinks twice before committing, the family structure will be affected. There will be changes, but not necessarily negative ones. Maybe 10 years from now, one will be able to direct one’s emotions better,” Subramanian points out.