Chances are that you are still reeling under some of the most preposterous, literally out of this world, action sequences in Vin Diesel's Fast And Furious 7. If you enjoyed them, here's what we have to say: Bollywood's been there, done that years ago. Just that what we do is never flashed around the world, and neither do we get the eyeballs!
Because the applause turns into a whimper the moment the 'scene' moves out of Los Angeles and lands in Mumbai. And, we don’t stop here. We even always diss Bollywood for not knowing anything about how a stunt should look like. No? But is it being fair to Bollywood?
If you're still not convinced, here's how we wrest our case.
You don’t say a single word of appreciation when Saif Ali Khan jumps off a plane on his car in Race 2. He also used parachutes, but, no, you’re blinded by all the Hollywood jazz. The only difference between the Fast and Furious 7 and Race 2 scenes is that the former had many cars while Race 2 featured just one car.
Fast and Furious 7
Now, watch these two scenes. The first is from The Italian Job and the other from its official remake, Players.
The Italian Job
Did you find any difference?You smirked when Sunny Deol pulled out a handpump in Gadar, but clapped when The Rock tore apart his hand-plaster in Furious 7.
Sunny Deol in Gadar
The Rock in Furious 7
The trouble is, we can't ever accept somebody as Indian as Sunny Deol to do things which are only meant for Hollywood wrestlers.Here is more. Our mutants are better than theirs. They can’t and don’t love in LA. But our’s are always ready to shed some tears and even break into a jig every now and then. We treat them equally, you see.
Kangana in Krrish 3
Jennifer Lawrence in X Men First Class
There are very few people in India who would actually understand the nonsense behind all the killings in Kill Bill 1 & 2, but that’s a cult film, and our very Action Jackson is loathsome. Why this partiality?Kill Bill 1
If their dinosaurs are intelligent enough to stalk their prey, why can’t our Creature 3D? Yes, he was a brahmrakshasa, but does that make any difference? They will remain fictional whatever you do.
Dinosaurs are not the only ones. Hollywood has a wide range of deadly creatures like ants, rats, bats, sharks and snakes which are born with just one purpose in life: to finish the human race. We at least try to justify their existence by giving a religious twist. But, you’ll laugh.
Bruce Willis banged his car into a helicopter in Die Hard and it was a worldwide hit. Some apes forced the human beings to evacuate a country, and you said it looked great. Somebody tried to touch the earth’s core and you were ok with it. Then what happened when Rohit Shetty blew off some cars and jeeps! If James Wan (Furious 7 director) is right, then there’s nothing wrong with Rohit Shetty as well.
And, before you connect this debate with Rajinikanth, allow us to tell you this: We don’t talk about him. He is above any such debate.And, just for the sake of giving you an idea about how evolved we were and we are, here’s a video that would tell you that laptops were invented in India centuries before the West thought of it.
(Rohit Vats tweets from Twitter/@nawabjha)