10 signs that you’re dangerously obsessed with Shah Rukh Khan

  • Shaoli Rudra
  • Updated: Apr 28, 2016 17:09 IST
Are you a crazy SRK fan? (AFP)

SRK’s next is about a man’s (played by SRK) “dangerous obsession” with his favourite superstar (also played by SRK). So Fan got us thinking: this whole ‘obsessed with SRK’ thing seems like the story of (some of) our lives – and maybe yours too. So here’s a checklist: You know you’re a crazy SRK fan when…

1. Your immediate response to the Panama Papers leak was: “Aise bade bade deshon mein aisi choti choti baatein hoti rehti hai”

2. Before every important meeting/presentation/interview, you look up that speech from Chak De! for inspiration: because coach Kabir Khan beats the pants off Shiv Khera and 70 minutes is all you need – “yeh sattar minute, tumse koi nahi chheen sakta”.

3. You have at least one friend called Kiran and s/he hates you: because you only ever call them Kkkkkk… Kiran.

4. In Mumbai, you drive past Mannat hoping that HE will appear on the chhat and wave at you – everybody knows it’s known to happen.

5. When you look back at the friends/lovers you’ve lost, you remember the moment when you first saw the end coming: you never could trust someone who hasn’t watched DDLJ.

6. You look for love on Facebook, not Tinder: because pyaar dosti hai.

7. But when you do Tinder/Grindr looking for men, you swipe right every Raj and every Rahul, just because.

8. You love petting stray cats just so you can channel your inner Don and say, “Mujhe jungli billiyaan bahut pasand hain.”

9. At every teary-eyed farewell party, you make everybody chuckle by saying “Jaa, Simran, ja. Jee le apni zindagi!” It’s also what you say at railway stations.

10. You would go to any length to pair every Karan you know with an Arjun (or vice versa) – just so you can invite both of them to a party and tell everybody, “Mere Karan-Arjun aayenge.”

From HT Brunch, April 10, 2016

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