Signs You're Suffering From IPL Withdrawal Syndrome
Hungover from the excesses of the IPL? Adjusting to life after the IPL is hard. After all, in extreme cases you might even be suffering from IPLWS (Indian Premier League Withdrawal Syndrome). Allow Dr. Dr. Dr. Jhunjhunwala to treat you.brunch Updated: Jun 15, 2011 13:43 IST
It's been 10 days since the Maha-Hoopla-Cricket-Gallata known as the IPL 4 got over. Of course there are still many desperately hungover from the excess IPL action. Adjusting to life after the IPL is hard. In extreme cases you might even be suffering from IPLWS (Indian Premier League Withdrawal Syndrome).
This is a very dangerous and unsettling disease. My vast knowledge of Medical Science which has led to me being called Dr.Dr.Dr.Jhunjhunwala allows me to recommend immediate, undelayed treatment for this condition.
Please look for the following signs and report to the nearest Doctor immediately in case any of the symptoms fit you.
You know you're suffering from IPL withdrawal syndrome when you:
o Take a bathroom break and call it a 'Strategic Timeout'.
o Look at the ' Get 33% extra free with this pack ' label on a box of Kellogg's Cornflakes in your local supermarket and complain to the store authorities that the word 'extra' is spelt wrong and must be spelt as EXXXTRA to keep up with the tradition of the 'Exxxtra Innings' IPL show.
o Attend Baba Ramdev's fast against black money. See a Sadhu type person at the same rally and ask him if the orange cloth wrapping around his head indicates that he is the orange cap holder for maximum runs scored in IPL.
o Decide to sue the Australian Cricket Team for copyright infringement because the yellow color of their uniform closely resembles the yellow of the Chennai Superkings' uniform.
o Storm into your Bank Manager's office demanding that the highest cash deposit in your account per week be renamed as the 'DLF MAXIMUM'
o Tattoo Chris Gayle's face and the words 'RCB for life' across your chest.
o Learn trivia about players who have come into the spotlight only due to the IPL like Rahul Sharma's highest score in the Call Of Duty game series.
o Punch anyone in the face who goes "Rahul Sharma, WHO?!"
o Watch a sport like Tennis and comment how Rafael Nadal's forehand is inspired by Delhi Daredevils' David Warner's sweep shot.
o Cannot watch Deepika Padukone's sexy 'Dum Maaro Dum' dance without first imagining Siddarth Mallya's critically acclaimed pretty boy facial expressions alongside.
Call up the radio station and ask them to play and dedicate the theme song of your favorite IPL team to your lover and then hope that this gesture gets her to say "Yes" to your marriage proposal.
The Fake Jhunjhunwala is the parody writer of the popular blog 'The Secret Journal Of Rakesh Jhunjhunwala'. He likes counting money. He is a big fan of Samosas, Ice Cream, Pav Bhaji, Pizza, Garlic Bread and Beer.
His hobbies include playing Super Mario, Stalking Hot Babes and Watching B-Grade films to intensively investigate any censor board violations. He also watches Cricket and worships Sachin Tendulkar as much as he worships himself. Read more from him at http://www.rakeshjhunjhunwala.in/
He can also be found on twitter usually ranting about Uday Chopra, The Universe and everything in between at http://twitter.com/Jhunjhunwala