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Being friends with Ms Moneybags

Accept who you are and what defines you as an individual.

education Updated: Jan 22, 2013 17:03 IST
Samir Parikh

Every individual has his or her own worth. Be it in terms of characteristics, temperament or even materialistic possessions. Most of us have friends not based on what they possess but because there was something about them that clicked with us as individuals. So if they happen to have more money than you, here’s how you should avoid any negative feelings about it.

1 You are who you are:
You have to learn to be comfortable and confident about who you are, what you believe in and what you want. The most important thing is to be able to accept what it is that defines us as individuals. This acceptance forms the backbone of all other aspects of ourselves and this is what enables to rise above all needs to be like someone else or feel others are better than us.

2 Life is not a competition: Many of us constantly face the struggle to figure the answer to the ever-elusive question “why can’t I have all that?” This question is truly reflective of the competitiveness that most of us experience with regard to others around us. Yes, to an extent this competitiveness when at a healthy level does act as a motivator. But beyond a certain point, it can take a turn for the worse. Before things reach this stage, we need to remind ourselves that life is not all about competing. You and I are not born to compete with significant others in our lives forever. We are born to share and grow together and develop as individuals.

3 It’s not all about the money: Money is not everything. Life has more to do with values, beliefs and what we ultimately make of ourselves. We all need to keep in mind the fact that it is our values and beliefs that help us transcend difficult times and not just money. Being able to live a life where the focus is on being a good person can do more for one’s sense of self than just having a whole a lot of money and not knowing what to do with it. If someone has something that does not always mean that you too need to have it as each individual’s needs and desires are different.

4 You can earn the money but not friendships: Never forget that money comes and goes but good friendships at that, which last for years, happen with great difficulty. Being engulfed with envy really is not going to do any good to your relationshops.

The author is director, Mental Health and Behavioural Sciences, Fortis Healthcare