I’ve been in a relationship with a guy for four years. And soon after I turn 18 this June I want to marry him but I need to convince my parents about it. His side of the family knows and supports our relationship. Since he’s five years older than me, he’s keen on getting married quickly. How do I go about convincing my parents?
Congratulations Priya, you will be 18 in June. You are in the generation where, soon, the rate of service tax will actually overtake your age. Now, since everything else seems okay, I take it the only problem is your age. I’m guessing that your parents (as would most parents) expect you to finish college and focus on a post-graduation degree. Falling in love for the first time is suggested at age 24. In my own daughter’s case, I’ve suggested 37. So obviously, 18 will shock most parents. If you insist on following your heart, try and win your parents over by showing them a blueprint by which you will complete your studies and graduate with flying colours, alongside your new matrimonial status. But remember, a married woman in junior college, who is not the teacher, can lead to a fountain of humour.
I am 16 and I’m dating a guy who claims to loves me, but doesn’t have time for me. He’s already broken up with me once, but he came back and we patched up. I don’t even know why I accepted it. I think I should stop calling him, but I can’t help myself. When I asked him if he values me, he had no answers. Let me know what I ought to do.
Anonymous, I take it that you’re the female of the species. Now remember what one of the 20th century’s great philosophers, H.M.T. watches, said, “If you have the inclination, we have the time”. Obviously your guy doesn’t have a strong inclination. Secondly, love and alliances are all about humiliation. Just look at the TMC and the UPA, for instance. Yet, it’s the degree of humiliation that one has to watch out for. This is for you to decide. Me, I already don’t like him. By the way, in case you are male, all this doesn’t apply.
I am 17 and I’ve had a crush on a girl in my class since the fourth standard. Now I’m in the 10th. Last year, I fell in love with another girl. I proposed to her, but unfortunately she said no. Now I don’t like that girl and I’m in love with the girl I always had a crush on. The problem is that both these girls are best friends. How do I propose to the girl I have a crush on? I am very depressed and it’s the end of my time at school. I really love her and will get to see her only another two or three times. I feel like committing suicide. Please reply soon, I really need your help.
Anonymous, please don’t even harbour thoughts like suicide. Nothing is worth losing your life for. When Brian Lara retired from cricket, I too felt like you, but better sense prevailed. You’re just 17 and there’s plenty of love to come. Having said that, you’re in the last over of this present match. Initiate contact with the original girl, but don’t rush the love button. The girls will talk, that’s fine, but remember to play it slow.
Once contact has been established, you can continue to communicate beyond school. P.S. If you’re still very disturbed, write to us again and we’ll recommend a real professional. After all, I’m just a hairdresser doubling as a psychiatrist. This paper has been hit hard by last week’s union budget, so they are getting just about anyone at minimum wages.