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'I love reading matrimonial columns'

I love reading the ‘wanted groom’ and ‘seeking bride’ matrimonial columns. Just to see what India is really looking for in a partner. I am not sure whether to laugh or empathise with people, writes Lara.

entertainment Updated: Aug 10, 2010 14:09 IST
Lara Dutta

Tall, handsome, caring, understanding, loyal, intelligent, educated and rich — looks like a description of the "complete man" if not Adonis himself! Beautiful, home loving, caring, fair, tall, forward thinking — sounds like we’re talking about Venus herself. I love reading the ‘wanted groom’ and ‘seeking bride’ matrimonial columns.



Just to see what India is really looking for in a partner today. Honestly, I am not sure whether to laugh or empathise with people (and myself) who believe there is something called perfection among humans. If any of us two-legged creatures was the person we always dream of having beside us, that person must be God! We dream of perfection without trying to first attain it ourselves.



Stand in front of the mirror, look at yourself in the eye and ask — how perfect am I? I know that I’m as imperfect as the next person. Thus, to seek perfection in others is to chase a mirage in the desert. And, when you finally realise that your companion is far from perfect, disenchantment sets in, but you continue to crave for something that is not there. Worse still, you refuse to believe that it is not there.



Lara DuttaThere is a huge difference between the man you meet at 8pm and the man who wakes up next to you at 8am. The same applies to the 8pm woman and 8am woman. In the evenings, we’re all dressed up and perfumed (as if to mask our true selves). But then, when you wake up you can’t stop the bad breath nor brush your hair back into place. You’re as disheveled as your partner and smell just like him or her. The eye shadow and lipstick are long gone; the carefully groomed hair of your man is in disarray.

Do you then still like him or her? Ask yourself. Will you continue to like him or her till “death do us part”? Frankly, few of us care to be honest to ourselves, leave alone to others. We lie as much as the person next to us; we’re as guilty of dishonesty; we’re selfish; we crave material satisfaction; we harbour bad thoughts; we have hatred within us. Every human being has committed at least some, if not, all of the Seven Deadly Sins.

If you truly believe you have none of these faults, exalt yourself to god-like status in match making columns and be sure to write in to me. Otherwise, may we embrace reality and our own imperfections and cut some slack when the sun comes up and the one next to us looks bleary eyed... take a quick look in the mirror before you decide that that’s not what you signed up for!

Read more Lara Dutta columns