If you thought you had heard them all, here are some Rajini jokes that'll make you rethink your belief. Read on for some of the whackiest Rajini-isms, ever!
1. When Rajinikanth does push-ups, he isn't lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down.
2. There is no such thing as evolution, it's just a list of creatures that Rajinikanth allowed to live.
3. Rajinikanth gave Mona Lisa that smile.
4. Rajinikanth can drown a fish.
5. Rajinikanth can delete the Recycle Bin.
6. Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes.
7. Rajinikanth once ordered a plate of idli in McDonald's, and got it.
8. The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajinikanth kicked one of the corners off.
9. Rajinikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone.
10. Rajinikanth has counted to infinity, twice.
11. Rajinikanth will attain separate statehood in 2013.
12. Rajinikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.
13. The only man who ever outsmarted Rajinikanth was Stephen Hawking, and he got what he deserved.
14. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. Rajinikanth lives in Chennai.
15. Rajinikanth kills Harry Potter in the eighth book.
16. Rajinikanth doesn't move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajinikanth.
17. Water boils faster when Rajinikanth stares at it.
18. Rajinikanth kills two stones with one bird.
19. Google won't find Rajinikanth because you don't find Rajinikanth; Rajinikanth finds you.
20. Rajinikanth grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.