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Skip these five at after-parties

entertainment Updated: Apr 27, 2012 15:43 IST
Serena Menon

The director of the soon-to-open F Bar Lounge Diner in Lower Parel has gone to town announcing that the club in Mumbai will be different from the property in New Delhi. He held the city’s early deadline responsible for that. This same 1:30 am curfew also makes after-parties a very crucial part of Mumbai’s nightlife scene, especially for those who want to make the most of a night in which they’ve spent a few thousands getting inebriated.

Usually in the parking lot or outside a bar as the clock strikes one, a person invites the party over. And, with the power to take the gang home for some extended revelry, also comes the responsibility of promising a good time with sufficient alcohol, cheap greasy food, music, the occasional Sinatra doo-be-doo-be-do and the right mix of people.

After having people throw up on beds, pick fights as pranks, throw wet toilet paper at people from balconies and make others want to leave, every host learns that the last element on the above list of must-haves is very important. Hanging out with a quirky bunch in the comforts of someone else’s club is easy. Taking them home isn’t. These are some kinds of people you may want to dupe into believing that you’re calling it a night:

The Poonam Pandey:

This person isn’t part of your immediate circle. She (it’s mostly a she) could be a player friend’s arm candy. She’ll make sure she’s heard, whatever that entails — throwing up, getting drunk, cranky, naked, generally disrupting things.

The party-pooper:

This person usually starts insisting she/he wants to leave/be dropped home when the after-party is actually getting started. Those who can’t say ‘no’, shudder.

The psycho/socially-inept roommate:

A few months ago,

a friend’s roomie got back from rehab (yes, cocaine addiction, at that). Then a few hours into the night, we got to know him up, close and personal. His fist that almost brought the door down along with our highs, that is.

The prankster who goes too far:

An aggressive argument gone wrong does not qualify for a joke. Also, broadcasting messages on BBs, crank calls and SMSes are not cool. There might be friends who have Amitabh

Bachchan’s number on their phones.

Imagine sending him a drunken text and being featured on his blog the next day. Who wants that?

The couple that doesn’t leave:

Every party has its end. Most people get the hint. Some don’t. And they are usually the most uninteresting ones, who’re waiting for some silent time so they can finally have their say.

(If you’ve never been able to drum up an after-party, maybe all your friends actually have work the next day.