HindustanTimes Fri,26 Dec 2014
Tooting your horn
Chitra Jha, Hindustan Times
New Delhi, February 05, 2013
First Published: 12:45 IST(5/2/2013)
Last Updated: 12:48 IST(5/2/2013)

For some reason our society discourages, even scoffs at, people saying nice things about themselves. This tendency is labelled as ‘blowing your own trumpet’, ‘being too full of yourself’, and worst of all, ‘having narcissistic tendencies’. If you have the habit of speaking about your strengths, you are considered pompous, obnoxious, and overbearing. But whether you like it or not, this is one trait which definitely pays off big time when you go for a job interview, because it makes you look confident and capable. The only problem is that since most of us are usually out of practice, we hesitate and fumble when we have to list our positive traits. So, how can you learn to promote yourself, not just in job interviews but in life itself?

Here are a few tips:

* Learn to say nice things about yourself and feel okay about it.
* Say nice things about others as well. Complimenting others invites compliments our way too!
* Smile more often, that will make you feel good about yourself.
* Develop a genuine interest in your strengths and strengthen them.
* Use your charm to inspire and persuade others of your goodness.
* Ask your parents, grandparents, relatives and friends to tell you positive stories from your childhood.
* Take time to listen to others’ suggestions about how you can improve yourself. Measure your personal growth on set parameters. 
* Be empathetic to yourself and don’t beat yourself for your failings, which are nothing but learning opportunities.
* Be sensitive to your need for love and appreciation. Give it to yourself.
* Learn to appreciate every small success of yours.
* At the end of the day, give yourself a loving hug and gently massage your limbs.
* Set attainable goals for yourself and share your thoughts with people who care about you. In any case, do care about your own self.
* Do not compete with others but have a vision for yourself. Know where you are heading. Give yourself a sense of direction. Work hard to translate your vision in life.
* Take the lead to be ahead of your own game of bettering yourself. Remain positive about life.
* Know that you can rely upon yourself each and every time. Give yourself enough reasons to believe in yourself.
* Take complete responsibility for your personal growth, especially when the tide is working against you. 
* Stick to self-growth principles. Develop your personal value system. Carry out your duties with diligence.
* Remain open to change, movement, innovation and new ideas.
* Boost your morale by doing things that make you joyful. 
* Make yourself the number one person in your life. Remember you are the centre of your universe.
* Never criticise yourself but if you catch yourself doing so, be magnanimous enough to forgive yourself.
* Let go of all the guilt and shame residing inside you.
* Welcome all possibilities and uncertainties.

The author is a life-skills coach, time-line therapist, and new consciousness writer. Contact: chitrajhaa@

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