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A load of bull

india Updated: Sep 21, 2008 20:11 IST
Hindustan Times
A load of bull

So is your third second cousin at Lehman Brothers now out of a job?
Well, let’s just say that he was seen carrying a box filled with stationery including a whole stack of staplers. Considering he was the coffee boy there, I don’t think his world has come crashing down.

But didn’t you say that the meltdown in the US economy will affect everyone?
Sure, and it has. My fifth second cousin has now decided not to go the US looking for a dream job. Apparently, there’s no studio apartment facing the Brooklyn Bridge in the post-meltdown pay package in any company anymore. And he doesn’t want the place they are offering. It faces a park full of suddenly drug-pushing Wall Street types.

Here at home, there are some jitters. I have a feeling that financial market reforms will be on a go-slow mode now.
You think so? Well, Chidambaram did mop his brow more than once when, a few days ago, he said that he will “keep the international context in mind” while pushing for reforms.

But don’t you love the irony of all those overpaid CEOs now being out of jobs?
Yes, reminds me of Marx.

Did he predict such a collapse in Das Kapital?
Not Karl, I mean Groucho. The great funny crypto-economist had said: Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.

So what’s that got to do with fat cats becoming thin cats?
It sums up the theory of commodity exchange.

That’s quite silly, if you ask me. But tell me something. How did your third second cousin who got kicked out from Lehman Brothers so quickly get a job at Merrill Lynch?
Well, he also delivers coffee at Bank of America that’s bought Merrill. So he’s expanding, I guess...

Don’t say: All in all, there goes another brick in the Wall Street story.
Do say: When America sneezes, the rest of the world catches the last batch of cold beer.