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A seat feat

Members of the elite force not only lounged around on the throne when Queen Liz was not looking but also purveyed bits of naughty literature from the royal premises.

india Updated: Apr 23, 2009 20:57 IST

It is a matter that many royal watchers would like to get to the bottom of. Did a bottom, or bottoms, without royal antecedents grace the throne of England? The answer, if a member of the British Royal Protection Service is to be believed, is yes. Members of the elite force not only lounged around on the throne when Queen Liz was not looking but also purveyed bits of naughty literature from the royal premises.

You may ask, is nothing sacrosanct anymore? No doubt the Queen is not amused at common posteriors on her seat. But, who, given half the chance, would not like to lower themselves into the coveted chair on the sly? The cops, many may argue, were a darned sight luckier than poor Prince Charles who has for aeons been waiting to get his rear into that seat. But with the Queen firmly entrenched, the dear man has been reduced to nattering to his potted plants. This is not the only affront the Queen has had to face in recent times. When the breezy Obamas nipped around to London to visit her, touchy feely Michelle wound her arm around the royal back. The Queen, not one for the common touch, had to grin and bear it. Well, no arm done there.

So, it would seem it’s open season on royalty. From illegal rave parties to racially inappropriate remarks, the British royalty has shown how low it can stoop to conquer. So if the throne has been unseated today, tomorrow we might see some yob prancing around with the Kohinoor on his noggin. A right royal challenge for the tottering House of Windsor.