You have to hand it to old Asif Zardari. He may be a wash-out as president of Pakistan but he makes up for it by really being a bag full of laughs. Some years ago, he came up with a few nifty one-liners about all Pakistanis and Indians having a bit of each other in them. Only to tell us the next day that he was just kidding. Then off he went to Washington where he apparently told the verbally challenged Sarah Palin that she was gorgeous. Only to assure everyone that he was looking to raise a titter or two before she mistook him for a moose and gutted him.
Now our Asif has people rolling in the aisles with his promise of a 1,000-year ideological war on Kashmir. We are curious to know what ideology he has in mind. Or was he trying to go one better than his father-in-law, the late Zulfikar Ali Bhutto, who promised a 1,000-year war with India? As we know it, old Asif is delightfully bereft of any ideology. But we could remedy that. We could send Prakash Karat, now at a loose end, around for some quick indoctrination in Marxism. And L.K. Advani, now job hunting, for a dose of Hindutva. As for radical Islam, he has tutors closer home.
Armed with this knowledge, Asif could be formidable opponent. Or maybe he’s just putting one across on us. He’s a right regular riot, isn’t he? But we do have one suggestion that might work in resolving the Kashmir dispute. We all know what a whiz Asif is at business matters. Without running any visible business, he is able to generate money out of thin air. And invest in property like a pub in London and several homes. We say never mind any ideological battle. Let him launch an economic battle. He’ll definitely wipe the floor with us in that one.