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Backbenchers hail historic 100% cut offs

india Updated: Jul 04, 2011 12:02 IST
Gursimran Khamba
Gursimran Khamba
Hindustan Times
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Backbenchers from across 12th grade in India hailed the historic 100% cut offs in some Delhi University colleges as the biggest educational equalizer since the Mandal Commission. The cut offs, which effectively put every student who scored 75% at par with those who attained 95% in their quest for university admission is being considered a moral victory by the former who have consistently been getting their ass kicked by parents and being called worthless.

Ranbir, a commerce student from Delhi Public School had this to say. "Look the thing is, this whole getting admission in a top DU college is a major ratrace. All the nerds in school who used to get 95, 96 % looked down upon us and our teachers kept sermonizing about how getting 70% is as good as being a leper. But now thanks to these 100% cut offs, even those smart asses aren't getting into colleges of their choice. Hell, even the CBSE Delhi topper couldn't make it to the Economics programme in SRCC! What's the point of busting your ass for two years only to meet the same fate as a 70%er? Atleast we got laid and partied in high school".

Shivam, who thought he had conquered the world after scoring 97.8% seemed distraught. "What's the point of studying so much if I have to stand in line with those Arts students? I guess I have no other option but to use some political connections and make it through the sports quota. And if that doesn't work - probably buy a caste certificate from some touts in Uttar Pradesh. How can one stay ethical in this system?"

Union HRD Minister Kapil Sibal rejected claims that this was a supply - demand issue. "Look the 100% cut off might seem a little absurd, but look at the bright side. Finally we will be able to fill the Hindi and Sanskrit (Hons) programmes with capable students instead of 37 year olds pretending to be students just so they can fight the DUSU elections".