'Neither with any of my teachers, nor with any fellow students, or anybody else, could I develop such a relationship as would drown me or break my being an island. Friends came and stayed with me. I met many people as well; had many friends. But from my side there was nothing dependent on them or which would cause me to remember them…I may live with everyone, but whether I am in a crowd or a society, with a friend or an intimate, I am alone. Nothing touches me, I remain untouched.'
From a very early age Osho used every experience, every situation, as a stepping stone towards inner growth. His awareness kept him from missing an opportunity in his search of truth.
Deaths of his beloveds — his sister, grandfather, and Shashi — gave him extraordinary chances to understand the limitations created by attachment with the other and, hence, to transcend the duality. He seized upon these chances and made himself really free to be by himself. Osho's own observation in this regard is important.
'Life gives many opportunities for being thrown back to oneself. But the more clever we are, the quicker we are in rescuing ourselves from such an opportunity. At such moments we move out from ourselves. If my wife dies, I am in search of another whom I can marry.
If my friend is lost, I begin to search for another. I cannot leave any gap. By filling that gap, the opportunity I would have had to revert back to my own self, is lost in a moment, along with its immense possibilities. If I had become interested in the other, I would have lost the opportunity to journey towards the Self…'
In experiencing his aloneness, Osho became more of an 'outsider', or a 'stranger'. He became rooted in a state of detachment in which even in the midst of activities and people, he remained alone.
'I became a universe unto myself,' says Osho.
Extract taken from Osho, The Luminous Rebel, Life Story Of A Maverick Mystic