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Dancing queen

india Updated: Dec 08, 2007 03:22 IST
Indrajit Hazra
Indrajit Hazra
Hindustan Times
Highlight Story

Madhuri ‘dhak Dhak’ Dixit made her comeback last Friday to the world of Bollywood cinema in Aaja Nachle. While most of us were overjoyed — oh, ok, curious — to see her back on the big screen (anything but seeing her on Karan Johar’s telly programme!) — not everyone was pleased with the film. And we’re not talking about the reason being a ‘political controversy’. But then did Madhuri Dixit care? Read on.

Dec 1, Saturday: Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. Here I was all excited about the premiere yesterday after a tiring and humiliating appearance in every second mall in the country to promote Aaja Nachle, and now this controversy. Aditya Chopra-ji called saying I’ll have to rework that dodgy dialogue and make it, “Mohalle mein kaisi maara-mar hai; bole Deepika bhi khud ko Madhuri hai.” I had told them not to put any dialogue in a dance movie!

Dec 2, Sunday: God! Now not only are Dalits cheesed off that Mayawati wasn’t given my role, but Aishwarya’s complained about a younger heroine not being given the role! Sriram, can’t we go back to Denver?

Dec 3, Monday: You know I’m not 25 any more. Being 30... oh, okay, 31 has its share of problems. Like getting to change the way I pronounce ‘daance’ in my interviews. Everyone seems to think I picked up an accent in America. But I haven’t guys! Wassup with everyone here? Dudes? Caan’t I daance in peace any more?

Dec 4, Tuesday: It was so nice to hear from Husain-saab today. He called up from an undisclosed location in Dubai and told me that he saw Aaja Nachle alone in a theatre. “Alone?” I said fearing the worst — that being the Dubai authorities had also banned the film for something that I expected them to ban it for. But Husain-saab is so sweet. He said that he had booked the whole theatre to himself to see me in the film properly. Apparently, he made a painting in 20 minutes of the cinema, showing me as an usherette. But that was confiscated by th authorities as Dubai does not allow women ushers in cinemas. Husain-saab said he didn’t like the B-movie quality of the film, and said I deserved better treatment. “Like the one I gave you in my Gaja Gamini.” I didn’t have the heart to tell him that in that film, he made my butt look too big.

Dec 5, Wednesday: Saroj Khan, my favourite choreographer, came over today for our bhel puri party. We bitched so much about my choreographer in Aaja Nachle, Vaibhavi Merchant that I may have said a word or two about her to Konkona. Thankfully, she seemed to be busy preparing for her next film about casteism in war-torn Sarajevo among displaced refugees from Jharkhand. So I’m safe.

Dec 6, Thursday: Sriram, who were you just talking to on the phone? What do you mean you don’t know! It was Shilpa Shetty again wasn’t it! God, I told you not to talk to her. After the musical, Miss Bollywood, with her in the title role having flopped everywhere, she now wants to do a dance movie with me.

U-huh, no can do. She can call Jennifer Lopez or... Juhi Chawla. Oh stop it, Sriram, I’m not being racist! Her name is Shilpa Poppadom!

Dec 7, Friday: Hello, Mr Chopra. I was wondering whether you would like to do a film with me and Shilpa Shetty in it? Yes, a dance movie, of course.

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