I have always craved for marriage: Sushmita | india | Hindustan Times
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I have always craved for marriage: Sushmita

Bollywood diva Sushmita Sen tells Subhash K Jha that how she enjoys doing David Dhawan films, doesn?t like being called a ?diva?, and believes love and marriage are part of cosmic design. And be it the sudden spurt of success as Miss Universe at 18 or the battle in courts to adopt her daughter Renee, they?ve all been full of turmoil when it happened.

india Updated: Jan 06, 2007 20:28 IST

She enjoys doing David Dhawan films, doesn’t like being called a ‘diva’, and believes love and marriage are part of cosmic design.                

How has life been treating you?

Fabulously! I’m 31, and rocking. And though at times I do explore other options, I wouldn’t have my life any other way. 2006 has been personally tough. But I’m an eternal optimist.

I say, ‘All right God, you’ve chosen me for this tough test. But please don’t make it into a habit’. I’m His favourite child. I wish the same for everyone.

Was 2006 your toughest year?
That would be hard to say.. I’ve faced all the hardships in my life as and when they’ve hit me. Whether it was the sudden spurt of success as Miss Universe at 18; or the battle in courts to adopt my daughter Renee; or my relationships, failed or successful, they’ve all been full of turmoil when it happened.

At 31, I realise nothing has been that bad because at 45 I’ll feel everything has been pretty much worth the while.

There’s an insatiable appetite to know more about your current man Manav. Why are you for once so secretive about your relationship?
As you get acclimatised to the media, you adopt a less bindaas approach to the limelight. Right now I feel, this is my life and I don’t need to justify myself.

As you mature, you realise relationships aren’t just about one person. The privacy of the other party in a relationship does matter. I may not be secretive about the relationship. The other person is. That’s it. It isn’t easy specially when pushed to a corner about being answerable about my relationship. As long as I can answer without compromising the other person, I do it.

As you get acclimatised to the media, you adopt a less bindaas approach to the limelight. Right now I feel, this is my life and I don’t need to justify myself.

As you mature, you realise relationships aren’t just about one person. The privacy of the other party in a relationship does matter. I may not be secretive about the relationship. The other person is. That’s it. It isn’t easy specially when pushed to a corner about being answerable about my relationship. As long as I can answer without compromising the other person, I do it.

I can’t let other people suffer for the choices I make in life. People are most welcome to be inquisitive about my life. I do enjoy sharing it.

So is this relationship more serious, therefore more private?
No the secrecy, as you call it, is purely because the person has asked me not to talk about it. I’d rather choose what my heart tells me to. I’ve a tremendously strong conscience. I’d never do something that makes me uncomfortable.

Do you feel the need to find a man who loves you for what you are rather than for being ‘The Sushmita Sen’?

God knows, the image is of no importance to me. And you can’t go looking for love. It would hardly depend on who I am. It will greatly depend on who he is.

I believe all the relationships you go through in life are actually a part of that cosmic design where love and mar riage finally finds you. I believe that will happen to me as well. Madhuri finally settled down with a US-based doctor who didn’t watch her films.

That’s tough to believe. But I’ll take your word for it. God bless Madhuri’s equation with her husband. I saw a picture of her with her husband and their two sons. And my heart melted! Blissful relationships are still possible in today’s world. As for me, I’d rather have a man see any and every thing I’ve ever done, and then be able to connect on a one-to-one level.

Do you crave for marriage now?
I have always craved for marriage. I’ve always been a home-lover, despite living a very public life, which I enjoy in my own way. I’m a 100-percent all-there person. When I’m at a public event I wouldn’t want to be at home, and vice versa.

Your two bravura performances in 2006 in Chingari and Zindaggi Rocks went unappreciated…
Sometimes I feel, why do I put so much love, effort and passion in all my roles? Over the years I came in with no expectations from myself. It was more like.. someone was offering me a chance to be in the movies with good money, so why not? Now, I’ve actually started enjoying acting. Cinema allows me to exhale.

It’s no longer about impressing others, but expressing myself. That’s why, when I’m accused of living in an ivory tell, I’ve to say that whether it’s life or cinema, one can’t function in isolation. Having said that, I must say I love ivory (laughs).

Do you feel the need to cut loose from the bustle?
Of course! Everyone has that need. Whether it’s meditation or a vacation, you do need to get away. We all need to go into that ivory tower once in a while to exhale. Otherwise we’ll burn out.

But when I take a vacation, I’m accused of being the diva in an ivory tower.

But you are a diva!
Can you please define ‘diva’ for me? Because I’m very confused. Of course I’m unreachable. But never unapproachable. I feel Bollywood still has a problem finding the right place for you.

I’ve never looked at this from their perspective. Speaking from my own perspective, I do understand my audience. I know a Main Hoon Na thrills them. And I do it only because I know that’s what audiences expect from me. But they’ve to allow me to do the stuff I enjoy doing. Otherwise I’ll stagnate. By the way I love doing David Dhawan’s films. And we’ll be working together again.

You can run around trees. But you have a problem running around the heroes?
Yeah, that’s always been a problem. I’m accused of remaining in my shell. But if you know what getting out of that shell entails, you’ll be very proud of me. Salman has always been a friend. But many actors are disappointed because I don’t socialise with them after hours.

I’m chirpy by nature. But to show up at every do wouldn’t make me comfortable. I remember during Main Hoon Na, I was all over the place trying to help Shah Rukh with his bad back. But when it came to chilling around with Farah and the others, I wasn't around.

But you’re yet to find a favourite hero to pair with.
What are you talking about? I’ve paired up with the greatest hero of them all.. God!

How different is the 30s from the 20s?
Oh, it’s like a decade of brilliance. It’s beautiful because I still have that sense of wonder about life, though it now comes with an understanding of how it works. The kind of life that has been bestowed on me is simply so fascinating.

If you were to breathe the air that I do, you’d realise what I mean. I don’t live my life by numbers. It’s not about 20 or 30. It’s just a figure!