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I’m back home

To hell with your clean streets and working traffic lights, I have no need of your superior infrastructure or your socially responsible citizens! Imran Khan is back after an outdoor shoot.

india Updated: May 18, 2009 18:49 IST
Imran Khan column

As promised, here I am, back in India! The air is lightly scented with garbage, there’s a symphony of horns blowing on the street outside (which is now even more dug up than before), and I’m sweating despite the fan being on full blast. But I’m home!

To hell with your clean streets and working traffic lights, (enter name of random foreign country); I have no need of your superior infrastructure or your socially responsible citizens! I’m home! Yes indeed, back to my own room, my own friends, and home food.

Ankita, I am a huge foodie (Happy Birthday, by the way), but I like home food best of all (grew up in boarding school, so I missed out for many years).

I know many people love traveling and seeing new places. Not me. I like my home, and am miserable when I’m away. Don’t ask what it’s like when I’m shooting off in (enter name of random foreign country). It’s a pain. All I can think of is finding a decent dal. Dal chawal; the greatest food ever, and the toughest to find abroad.

The important thing is that I’m back. And starting work in earnest on my next film, tentatively titled 7 Days in Paris. What do you guys think, do you like it, or should it be a Hindi title? We’re currently in pre-production, which involves all the planning of the film.

The songs are being recorded, the stylists are putting together the costumes, Sanjay the director is sitting with his team and working out all the shooting days; which scenes will be shot when, and what the locations will be for each scene. The production team is booking plane tickets (to Paris, obviously) and hotel rooms for everyone, hiring cars to transport people, making payments to hold on to the locations.. and that’s not even half of it.

In the meantime, Katrina and I are rehearsing the scenes and dialogue to make sure it all looks easy and effortless on screen. Sanjay is working with us to fine tune our characters and performances, and we’re all spending all our time wondering what more we can do to improve the film in any way.

Then begins shooting; three months of waking up at 5am, shooting from sunrise to sunset day after day, trying to look bright and happy all the time, and not letting your enthusiasm slip.

Followed by at least three, and sometimes six months of editing and background music. And then, at long last; Opening day. That one Friday that decides the fateof what we’ve all spent a year making. And not one person in the world can ever know what will work and what won’t. That’s the short introduction to film making. Who feels like getting to know the long version?

** Responses:
* Arpita, I’m sorry I missed replying to your last two emails.
* Jaane Tu girl, jealousy is a wasted emotion because it accomplishes nothing. Either talk to your Rats openly, or let it go.
* Zunoor, I have already joined the gym!
* Nikie, with an invitation likethat I guess I’ll have to visit Punjab.
* Manu, glad you got out of thehouse. And good luck with that profile pic.
* Simran, reply kar liya. Ab kya?
* Shramika, once you’re a little past 15, you’ll love handbags.
* Anj, do you look like Jim Carrey in Mask or Ace Ventura? There’s a big difference.