Blame it on the lack of a dependable foreplay technique — or a bad dinner. But when I woke up yesterday and took a look at my favourite newspaper (this being the sweetener for HT editors to publish this piece), my roving eye plonked straight to the small headline on page 1: ‘Fewer Indians have orgasm: survey’. I flipped the pages to get the whole story and found that among us desis, only 46 per cent of us manage to get an orgasm “almost every time” we indulge in sex.
Now considering there are a vast number of couples in this country for whom having sex has a one-to-one correlation to having babies, one wonders whether the strike rate of coition and having the Big O is radically high from data in other countries — say, like Holland.
The other query as a curious onlooker I had was what the gender break-up was. Considering it’s notoriously difficult for men to fake an orgasm, was the Indian figures being ‘dragged down’ by the women? And, of course, the other question that seems to have been left a mystery — does having an orgasm during variants of Bill Clinton’s definition of ‘sex’ count?
All these questions were added to the query I had about what kind of people would admit/fabricate that they don’t have an orgasm every time an orgasm was warranted.
With these thoughts I turned back to page 1 of my favourite paper where my eye was caught by another headline of a brief story: ‘Defence Minister pledges orgasm.’ I looked again. No, even the nice Mr Anthony wouldn’t do that. The headline was ‘Defence Minister pledges organs.'