Do you sense people speaking in a very different kind of English?
Yesh! I pheel it een thee ayar, I pheel it een my bones. Bhy, can eyu tell my bhy?
Well, some doctors have called it Budgetitis, a not uncommon temporary ailment that strikes people when they listen to too much of a strong Bengali accent.
But I am no Bengali, I am, een phact, non-Bengali!
Did you listen to Mamata Banerjee’s Railway Budget speech yesterday?
Indeed I did...
There you go. Listening to her speech triggered a spot in your hippocampus...
Hippo? I habh not been anybheyr een in the bhicinity of a joo.
No, hippocampus is a part of the brain. Doctors predict a spike tomorrow among all people after Pranab Mukherjee’s done delivering his budget speech.
Eeyu mean there is no ceyor phor this mala-di?
Mala-di? Oh, you mean malady. The only protection known to man against Budgetitis is to hear Montek Singh Ahluwalia speak during both budget speeches. His pucca English accent can cancel the heavy Bengali accents of Mamata and Pranab.
Good heabhens! Let me call Dr Amartya Sen, Nobel laureate to phix a meeting with Dr Ahluwalia right now!
Do say: Plis be shited.
Don’t say: Still no Bengali