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This beats everything

Since our leaders never shy away from the good fight, let’s make this practice part of the daily proceedings, HT writes.

india Updated: Sep 06, 2012 23:11 IST

It is time most of you stopped kvetching and grumbling about our political class. We’d like to inform you that it takes a plethora of skills which many of us lack to become and stay a politician of any note. Now many of you will express disgust at the way in which a BSP MP and a SP MP engaged, to use the word loosely, with each other in the Rajya Sabha recently. How many of us have the stamina and skill to physically take on someone we disagree with? That’s right, let’s admit it, we are both cowardly and physically unfit to slug it out with our opponents. But some of our elected representatives don’t allow such trivial matters to deter them.

They may be bordering on the unfit but they never shy away from the good fight. As countless instances in our state legislatures and Parliament show, our lads, even the occasional lady, can give as good as they get. Given how common this practice has become, we suggest that it be streamlined and made part of the daily proceedings. No sooner does an MP or minister introduce, say a contentious bill, the opponents should chose one among them to administer an opening slap on the offender. Then, it is likely that all hell will break loose. This means that our worthies will have to sweat it out a bit in the gym and hire trainers to ensure that they are in peak condition when in the midst of a fracas. A tip or two from our Olympic medal-winning sportspersons may come in handy. The hardier have been known to rip up mikes and fling chairs in the game of politics which is clearly not for the faint of heart.

But who are we to complain? This is the epitome of news as entertainment. And we have thought of how this could work well in our favour. You could place your bets on a particularly bellicose politician and see how he fares in the next round of fisticuffs. We who have studied our elected representatives from close quarters would be happy to pass on a tip or two, for a price, of course. But if you take a beating, don’t think you can beat up on us, because we’ll beat it long before the results are out.