This is such atyachar | india | Hindustan Times
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This is such atyachar

india Updated: Apr 17, 2009 16:26 IST
Priyanka Chopra column

I am so touched! Thank you all so much for the wonderful messages, cards, flowers, candy wishing me a speedy recovery! Thank you for making me feel better and much loved with your sweet (and also humorous wishes)!

Reading the messages, I realised that I was not the only one who disliked hospitals! Yes, I know, my parents are doctors and I’ve practically grown up within the walls of various hospitals… so how can I hate them, you ask? Don’t get me wrong, it’s not the hospital, but being a patient is what I can’t handle! As I was lying there in my hospital bed, partly groggy, partly in pain and majorly bored, I tried to come up with some brilliant concept that would help others like me, make it through their hospital stay! Here’s what I came up with:

* Get into collaboration with a major perfumery to create a new hospital scent… Imagine the scent of ‘Sick and Deadly’ by Gucci, a musky fragrance with lemon and fruit essence! So much better than disinfectant, don’t you think?

* Another collaboration… but this time with food! Imagine a McHospital or a Pizza Hospi or even a Kareem’s & Pills or better yet, a ‘Haldi-hospi-ram! Yummy. It’s possible to marry taste with health guys… just think of the stuff patients are forced to eat! Ugh!!!!

* Create a lounge area on every floor, so when your friends and family come to visit you, it will feel like you’re catching up with them socially. Irrespective of whether you have a small illness or something major, the people who come to visit you (God bless them for making the effort) look at you like you have no hope left! I think it’s the fact that they see you lying in bed, in a very odd hospital gown and various tubes attached, that makes them feel this way! Maybe a different environment will help change this!

* A nursing internship! Everyone should be allowed to bring in some friends (the numbers will depend on the duration of your stay). These friends will intern under the nurses assigned to the individual in question. They will be the go-between, so that the terrified patient can be spared the wrath of the experienced nurses (God bless them, too, for the excellent job they do, in such trying circumstances).

* The meditative quickie! Can be offered at the entrance. A 10-minute meditation session for patients and visitors who are terrified of hospitals. Shanti, shanti!

* Gifts Galore, the new one-of-its-kind, in-hospital gifting store! More often than not, people never have the time to buy you gifts, though they want to. It’s a well-known fact that gifts have a therapeutic effect! Ooooh what fun… I can make a list. Things that will keep the boredom away!!!

I’m feeling a bit like Dev D right now, injected full of medication and hallucinating about the ideal hospital! Forgive me, but being in hospital is a physical and emotional atyachar!