This week, the Vox populi survey on relationships set a trend. It revealed what we’ve all known all along, but never admitted: Love is important, but money is crucial. And love without money is an absolute no-no.
As many as 150 surfers the world over responded to the survey.
Our first question went straight to the crux of the issue: What drives a relationship today?
As many as 64 surfers said trust. Close behind were 44 of them who said money was the driving force. Surprisingly, love took a back seat, with only 32 people opting for it!
The second question was an eye-opener. We posed a question from everyday life: You realize that your rich date is in debt. What do you do?
A whopping 73 people said they would stick by their date. 51 others opined that they would wait and watch. Only a meagre 25 surfers said they would pack up and say goodbye. After all, money does matter!
Question three evoked a predictable response. We wanted to know what our surfers would do if their rich date was cheating on them. As many as 105 of our surfers said they would leave, rather than stick on in a loveless relationship. 23 people said they would cheat back. Only 12 said they would try to work things out.
Question 4 probed into the relevance of the institution of marriage today. Interestingly, a majority of our surfers still believed in the institution of marriage. 97 people believed it is important, while only 19 of them said they’d prefer to stay single.
Not to be forgotten are 24 of our surfers who said marriage is impractical and a live-in relationship is the better option. Can we assume then, that times are a-changing and Gen-X have their priorities clear? Perhaps we could.
The next question was targeted at the die-hard romantics. Do you believe in love at first sight?
Surprisingly, most of our surfers did not believe in such a thing. 68 of them opted for an emphatic NO, while 35 of them said it was more a case of lust at first sight. The hard-core romantics comprised 37 people.
The last and final question asked our surfers what attracts them most to a person.
82 people opted for confidence and intelligence. Looks figured next, with 41 people choosing it, while only 17 people said money was an ‘attracting’ factor.
So what exactly did our surfers feel about the relationships of today?
Neena Dalmiya from Mumbai was forthright: “It's a materialistic world out there. Money comes first. Everything else is secondary. If one has money, half the problems we have today will never arise.”
Dhanush, again from Mumbai, echoed the sentiment: “Relationships are a farce today. Lets' face it- it's money that drives any relationship. No longer is love a binding factor, if u have money you have it all. Otherwise, you're a no one.”
Shalini Girotra from Delhi agreed: “Love is important, but things get sour if there is no money to survive on. A basic amount to sustain needs, like a car, a home and an education for your kids etc is nothing extravagant. This holds true for person like me who believes there is no end to amount of money you have. But if my husband cheats on me, even if he is a multimillionaire, it will be impossible to continue the relationship.”
Suren, a surfer from Toronto had a more realistic view: “I have been in a marriage earlier. This is my second. And there could be a third. So love is transient. Only one thing is for sure: It’s all money and manipulation today. It’s not that people don’t care for one another, it’s just that money matters are top priority and no other issue is as important.”
On the other hand, a surfer called Isha Baugh from New Delhi still believed in the power of love. She said: “For me, love is first. Because it is very difficult find a lover who is true to you. Money cannot stay with u always. But your lover will remain with you for life. Money can be finished in an hour but love cannot be drained out in an hour. You might have all the money you need today, but tomorrow it may vanish. And you may also die. So, I always prefer love to money.”
Shane from Kuwait said: “Any relationship based on honesty and trust will always work. However, life is very stressful now, so money and financial security does play a great role in providing a stable relationship. But it is of utmost importance that we give lay stress on values like trust, sincerity and honesty in our relationships and be role models for our kids.”
A great many of our surfers agreed it was becoming increasingly difficult to cultivate virtues like sincerity and honesty in a relationship. Ankit from Bhopal had this to say: “The rat race for money is so pronounced these days, that it has become impossible to be virtuous and honest. This naturally reflects on our relationships.”
The icing on the cake was the response from Debashree Jana of Kolkata. “I had a lover not long ago, and we were made for each other. We went around for 6 years and were the talk of the town. He even proposed to me. Our parents also didn’t mind. But very soon, he ditched me for an IIT-Ahmedabad graduate, who was on her way to the US. There ended all my dreams. So tell me, what is really important: love or money? I thought love was-but I’m forced to say money is.”
We thank all our surfers for participating in the survey. Vox populi will be back next week with another interesting debate. Till then, have a good week ahead!