The great Indian wedding never ceases to amuse me. Downturn wasn’t a word in the dictionary of this Pan Masala baron who had an extravagant week long affair for his son’s wedding.
One day Mallika Sherawat swayed her booty and the very next day Bipasha Basu ignited hearts with her bidi jhatkas. Lesser stars like Raveena and Neha were there in dime a dozen for the families to scramble for photo-ops. If that wasn’t ostentatious enough, there were ribboned-up cars for the groom – Mercedes SLK one day, Mercedes S Class the next day and a Mini Hummer, the day after.
Now since I am talking weddings, let me tell you this that ‘bachelors’ bash’ is passé. Now the bride-to-be has a hens’ party. And mind you, if you are the types who get scandalised by the sight of a bare-chested man, you rather give this hens’ do a skip. Few of my female friends went to this hens’ party and found half a dozen firang men doing a Full Monty. I can pretty well visualise women going ooh and aah and some even clawing these male-strippers. But the scene that my friends described was far far scandalous. The things some women did, I simply can’t write about it here. All I can say that it was a desi version of ‘Girls Gone Wild’. I am sure you got the picture!
Seriously, women have left the men far behind in all departments. Still we celebrate ‘Women’s Day’, like we are celebrating it today. Bachelor bashes were all about cabaret shows or mujras and now the whole concept of bachelor bash is out of fashion. Hens’ parties have taken over. I would be really worried if I had a wife and she went to these hens’ parties. Thank God, I am not so!
I was lucky to be at a posh ladies’ lunch affair. Thanks to my work, I at times get to go were many men can’t. I really enjoyed the afternoon and in matter of hours, I was filled up on the city’s latest goss. I got to count the number of Birkins and to my utter surprise, I counted almost a dozen in a group of thirty ladies.
A wise lady told me, “Birkin in Delhi these days is like Black Label whisky. There are more Birkins in the capital itself than ever sold by Hermes, just like Delhi drinks up more Black Label than what Johnnie Walker annually produces.” Hmmm... I got your point lady. Ladies not only fake orgasm, they fake the Birkins too!
How bland would be Women’s Day without some spicy gossip? I won’t let that happen ladies. Affair with personal-trainers is in fashion. If you don’t have a personal trainer, you are a nobody and if you aren’t flirting with him, you aren’t adventurous enough. Also, you ain’t clued in if you ask a lady with a running nose, “babes you got cold?” No darling, it is not the cold but partying hard that gave her a running nose morning after. Society ladies have taken to ‘powdering their nose’ too seriously.
Cocks move away, let the hens play!