What’s your problem, Imran? | india | Hindustan Times
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What’s your problem, Imran?

india Updated: Aug 06, 2009 21:04 IST

It’s very tragic. After so much of hard work… for every one step we take forward, we are forced to take three steps back. I never realized the problem was so deep. But once again, I’m glad I’ve recognized it early and I’m committed to resolving it, no matter how long it takes. For me, every layer of problems I reveal and work towards changing is one less layer that we—the women of the world have to deal with!

Imran and your band of merry conspiracy theorists… please, please, please understand one simple fact. There is no battle, no war… between women and men. There is no clash of Mars and Venus. But if it’s a fight you want… a fight you will get.

For every
Dr. Samant, Confuscius of the North, Khiladi or any of the great warriors you have hiding in your cave, I will raise you a Lara Croft, The Bride (remember Kill Bill), Mikaela Banes (she kept Sam Witwiky in the game man), Roma (SRK couldn’t get over this Kali Billi), the *#@ whooping ladies from Tekken and so many others. Not only will we arrive for the fight but we’ll make it look real good (refer to fab outfits and hairstyles of the ladies mentioned above as opposed to your team of hairy armpits and undies on top of your clothes).

But, I still say… don’t get into a battle you can’t win. Instead, remove the blinders from your eyes (I’ve discussed this with you before in one of my columns) and come to us directly… your mum, Avantika, me or anyone of the wonderful female friends that you have! We have the answers… for everything! WE KNOW why God created us! You just need to understand that before it’s too late!

And that’s exactly what happened with our fellow columnist Kunal… he understands the reality! Kunal (I have to say that you’re a pleasant surprise of serenity in this world of boys intent of war), just to clarify… we’re not the enemy nor are we devious. We are just a unique combination (as you so rightly put it) of intelligence and intellect, beauty and sexiness, common sense and patience and so many other wonderful qualities. As a reward for your enlightenment, I’m sending you a collector’s edition pack of DVD’s — “The absolutely best of Priyanka” with a Bonus CD of Tomb Raider and play station games! Who needs the boys now, right Kunal?

Psst… girls… have you noticed that the dreaded ‘Male Jump to Conclusions Syndrome’ (MJTCS) and other such symptoms seem to be afflicting only Imran. I think we have a problem. Any suggestions?

A big shout out to the readers — thanks for continuing to write in with your thoughts and feedback. I promise to respond next week!