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When love and life collide

india Updated: Jan 11, 2007 13:44 IST
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What does one do to get over a broken relationship? Get into another love affair? Or shy away from any kind of commitment for a while? Well, if you decide to opt for the former, take care, because you could unwittingly use your new relationship as a punching bag to vent the frustrations of the former relationship.

Trust my words, for I am witness to such an instance and it happened with my own cousin Mohan.

Mohan was an average 'looker', who always saw the brighter and better side of things. He happened to meet a girl named Jyoti, who was desperately in need of a person to   support her and understand her feelings. So Mohan, with his humour and charming manners, got close to her in no time.

After a while, they decided to take their relationship to another level and turn it into love. So Mohan became the perfect lover and Jyoti, his caring mate. Both felt secure and rejoiced in their new life, full of happiness and love.

Like all good things however, this state of affairs did not last for long. Jyoti, who had suffered a broken relationship in the past, began to be assailed by feelings of negativity and self-criticism. She became moody and withdrew into a sullen silence.

Having been ditched once, she became determined to prove the more capable and stronger lover. And take out all her frustration on her newfound love, Mohan. 

So she began to avoid him and criticize his every act. She took objection to everything he did and hated him for his presence. To add to this, she began to bully him and command him to get things done her way. This drifted them apart and resulted in massive, violent quarrels.  Before very long, Jyoti realized that all she ever wanted was someone to take revenge on, someone she could thwart, like she was thwarted years ago. 

And then she did the unthinkable. She, who cursed the broken relationship she had with Karan, suddenly decided to get back to him.

So poor Mohan was discarded like a leaf, with not so much as a chance to express his angst.  He was left behind with a broken heart, while Jyoti sailed into a new horizon, with her past mended and all wounds healed.     

Which is why I say, the healing process is never complete. Old wounds can cause new ones, specially in love. Where a relationship is concerned, it is all about the individual's feelings and what is right for him/her at that point of time. When it comes to personal well being, people tend to be selfish and rude.

True love is rare, because misunderstandings rule over every relationship. So in my opinion, to treasure profound happiness and maintain a healthy relationship, the operative word should be 'trust' and more importantly, love.

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