Now, for those of you who turned in dateless and earlier than fellow party-goers this New Year’s Eve, take heart. It seems that those 40 winks are much more precious to the masses than finding a long-forgotten tenner in the old jeans pocket or even cuddling up in bed. In fact, if a survey by Britain’s Batchelors Cup-a-Soup makers is to be believed, most people would prefer to doze off on their own rather than waste time getting cosy with their partners. What’s more, a good night’s sleep guarantees greater bliss than the odd lie-in, sleeping on freshly-laundered bed linen, uncontrollable laughter, reminiscing with friends and even a grand bargain at your favourite store.
Now, only if our judges back home had known this earlier — and duly followed that age-old ‘early to bed and early to rise’ adage — they’d have promptly tucked in at seven and woken up fresh enough to plough through those mounting case files. And have been spared the wrath of litigators and legislators alike, given their propensity to teeter at the edge of wakefulness while graver matters hang in the balance. So, with the proposed new Judicial Standards and Accountability Bill, 2009, our men in black won’t be hitting the snooze button on their alarm clocks anymore. Under the new rules, the gavel’s set to come down hard on the sloppy and the drowsy.
It’s hard to blame our lawgivers, given that long-winding legal arguments can easily put even hardcore energy-drink junkies to sleep. But the fact that the next time they nod off during a hearing they can be hauled up before an Oversight Committee should serve as a wake-up call for those looking for a quick catnap in the courthouse. Our advice: it’s best to get that good night’s sleep, mate.