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HindustanTimes Thu,21 Aug 2014

7 do's and don'ts of starting a new romance

Divya Makhija, Hindustan Times   June 12, 2014
First Published: 17:16 IST(12/6/2014) | Last Updated: 09:28 IST(13/6/2014)

You've just fallen in love with the perfect man or woman. And you obviously want this relationship to last. But you aren't sure how to go about it, whether to go slow or dive deep in? You want to act sensible and not scare the other person off with all that love in your heart, right?

Sample these do's and don'ts to help your new romance mature into a great romance.

1 First up, become good friends:  To make the foundation of any relationship strong and long-lasting, it's necessary to better know each other better, understand their feelings and thinking.  You don't want any kind of hesitation coming in between the two of you. And if you can share your deepest thoughts and feelings without a second thought, then nothing better.

2 Meet often, but not too often:  When in a new relationship, one wishes to spend every moment with the special one. It's understandable that there's excitement, but remember to maintain some distance and not give him/her too much of your time. You don't want to become annoying or too needy, so early in a relationship. Go on dates once or twice a week to keep the love and excitement going for a long-term bond.

Read |  5 steps: this is how you ask a woman out like a man

3 Don't get clingy: Just because you're dating doesn't mean you own each other. If you really want to have a healthy and pleasurable relationship, learn to give each other space, from the very start. Here's how - don't ask too many personal questions, encourage the other person to share things, instead of limiting all conversations about you, your needs and desires.

4Accept each other: When you fall in love with someone, you fall in love with a person who is different from you, someone who might not be everything you dreamt of in your lover. So instead of changing his/her habits to suit you learn to adjust. By trying to change someone at the very beginning of a relationship, you risk the chance of losing them forever. And that you don't want.

5 Take it slow: We realize a sexual relationship is crucial for any relationship to survive and grow, but getting intimate, too early isn't advisable. Rather in a new relationship, try to sneak in a long conversation and learn about each other's likes, dislikes and interests. This will cultivate a better understanding and comfort level between the two of you and when the time comes, both of you will be a lot more open about sex and all other personal issues.

Read | Dating at work: the good, the bad, the ugly

6 Move over your ex: If there's an ex lurking around you, get rid of him/her and embrace your new relationship.  Don't let your former girlfriend or boyfriend create tension in your present. Close friendship with an ex is also something we won't recommend, it will crop up time and again and create unwanted friction between you and your partner.

7 Keep living your life: People sometimes make the mistake of dropping their friends when a new love enters the picture. No matter what gender you belong to, it's best to maintain your friendships and family ties along with your new-found love. Take time out and meet friends even when you're dating someone. This will help keep your relationship going and show the other person that you value all the important people in your life.


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