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HindustanTimes Sun,26 Oct 2014

Fresh dating style: The New Rules

AFP   January 16, 2013
First Published: 17:45 IST(16/1/2013) | Last Updated: 15:05 IST(17/1/2013)

Perhaps if you were single in the 1990s you'll remember all the fuss over The Rules, the cult phenomenon and dating bible that was referenced in Sex in the City. The premise: play hard to get to achieve your happily-ever-after matrimony. Now authors Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider are giving their tome a fresh revision for the digital era.

Out this month internationally, The New Rules: The dating dos and don'ts for the digital generation, extends the retro mantra to the cyberworld with 31 new rules, to help gals remain mysterious on social media, navigate the world of texting, and keep a man at an arm's distance even while emailing.
Don't constantly update your Facebook status with mundane reports, and stay away from a man's Facebook profile, or at least never mention it to him. Wait at least four hours to reply to a man's text, and never after midnight. Avoid all texting, messaging, email, and social media updates between the hours of 6pm on Friday and 6pm on Sunday. This apparently will drive the boys wild.

For the rest of us, it's a welcome return to anonymity, to relinquishing the constant anxiety over whether you should be publicising how cool you are by tweeting your global positioning reference every time you enter a cool new bar or restaurant, writes The Independent in the UK.

For those needing a primer as to how to become a Rules Girl, here the basics:

1. Don't talk to a man first
2. Don't stare or look at men, and don't talk too much
3. Never spend your own money on a date, and let him travel to meet you
4. Don't call him, ever, and only rarely return his calls
5. Never accept a date on Saturday night if he asked you after Wednesday.
6. Always end the date first
7. Stop dating him if he doesn't buy you presents (you, however, shouldn't buy him anything)
8. Only agree to see him once or twice a week

While The Rules has legions of fans, and even Blake Lively and Beyoncé reportedly tried them (on Leonardo DiCaprio and Jay-Z respectively), others find them plain ol' sexist.

The writers of The Rules are charlatans attempting to con women into believing that it's empowering to give up all their power, writes blog Jezebel. Jezebel's rules: 1. Be a person with a life. 2. Respect other people and their lives. 3. Be patient. 4. Don't be desperate.


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