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HindustanTimes Sat,27 Dec 2014

'Mamma’s boys' better at relationships?

ANI   March 23, 2012
First Published: 14:09 IST(23/3/2012) | Last Updated: 11:41 IST(27/3/2012)

Men have long been criticized for being mummy’s boy but a new book has asserted that having a close mother-son relationship actually helps boys to have better relationships with others.

Author Kate Stone Lombardi in her book The Mama’s Boy Myth, insisted that the old stereotype that these men are weak and more likely to be gay is not true.

In fact, mummy’s boys have a ‘broader definition of masculinity’ that is of considerable benefit to their mental health.

CoupleLombardi made contact with more than 1,100 mothers over the Internet to know their experiences.

The 55-year-old, who has a 23-year-old son and 26-year-old daughter, found that society fears a ‘blindly adoring mother’ putting endless praise on her son, the Daily Mail reported.

She asserted that the widely accepted stereotype is that ‘any boy close to his mom will be a sissy, a wimp, forever dependent and never a man who can have a healthy relationship’.

Lombardi, who lives in Chappaqua, New York, also said that there was an ‘unspoken fear’ that if a mother was too great an influence, her son would turn out gay.

These sons are also less prone to become repressed men who cannot talk about their feelings, less susceptible to peer pressure and more likely to postpone their first sexual experience.

Another advantage is that mothers are better communicators.

“We don’t know why - if it’s specifically because of the nature of the mother-son communication,” Lombardi said.

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“But dads tend to have a big sex talk or big drug talk. Moms weave it into everyday conversation. It’s more subtle and more often.”

“Sons really need their moms and the last thing they need is withdrawal of support,” she added.


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