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HindustanTimes Wed,24 Sep 2014

Oh love: the 10 worst pick-up lines of all times

Sanya Panwar, Hindustan Times  New Delhi, April 16, 2014
First Published: 17:10 IST(16/4/2014) | Last Updated: 19:02 IST(16/4/2014)

There are good pick-up lines and then there are the bad ones (Do you believe in love at first sight or shall I walk past again?). Creepy ones (So, how many kids do you want?), and cheesy ones (Your dad must be a terrorist, because he made a bomb). There are also witty ones (Hey, didn't we go to different schools together?), and dirty ones (You don't need a bodyguard, you need a 'bootyguard'). And then, there are ones that work and ones that don't.
 
Not all of us are blessed with the gift of gab or the nerves of steel to hook the interest of an attractive person, right? In fact, most of us don't have such talents, which is why pick-up lines were created.

Read: Single? Drink, flirt & be merry

Read: What drives men to flirt at work

Also read: Drawing the line between flirting and cheating

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Here's a list of the worst pick-up lines of all times. Some of these have to be the worst you've ever heard. Just in case you're planning on using any of them, they may not get you the guy/girl but they will make them laugh (a few of these will make them laugh pretty hard). Unless you enjoy being laughed at, consider yourself warned.
 
So let's get started with number 10.

10 Are those space pants? Because your ass is out of this world.
Our verdict: No. Just no. If you say this, first, you'll come off as crass, and second, your IQ will shine through.
 
9 I'm sorry, were you talking to me? No? Well then, please start.
Our verdict: Not only is this cheesy, but it's kind of pathetic. If this is how you start a conversation, it is better you go home and invest in a relationship with your remote. After that, sleep.
 
8 If I were a fly, I'd land on you first, because you're the sh*t.
Our verdict: Sounds like something a freshman would say at his/her first college party. This pick-up  line doesn't stand a chance in hell. 
 
7 Excuse me, can you give me directions... to your house?
Our verdict: This is stupid. Really stupid. And you'll look stupid saying it. Also, there's this thing called stalking. It gets you a couple of years in jail.
 
6 Oh, excuse me, I think you dropped something... (after a sec or two, hand her/him a piece of paper with your phone number).
Our verdict: This reeks of desperation, total lack of confidence. And you wonder why she/he doesn't call. 

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5 I wish I were one of your tears, so I could be born in your eye, run down your cheek, and die on your lips.
Our verdict: This pick-up line is so bad that its actually good. If, and only if, your object of interest is ALSO an eight-year-old. If not, avoid this super cheesy line at all costs.
 
4 Hey, you look really fun. I had to come talk to you...
Our verdict: Fun, really? Sounds like something you'd hear on one of those reality dating shows. Why not just say 'hi'?
 
3 My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can't keep it in.
Our verdict: Uh, gross! If you use this line, we think your love is just sh*tty. Unless your object of interest has a poop fetish, this pick-up  line is destined to fail.
 
2 Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? (Also, sample this. Guy: Hey babe, did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Guy: When you fell. Girl: Fell? Fell from what/where? Guy: Heaven)

Our verdict:  And that's how he fell from grace…
 
1 You have something on your butt. My eyes!
Our verdict: Any reference to a body part, or for that matter your ability as a lover, is off limits when attempting the fine art of the pick-up. Better wait till the second date or third and then start revealing your Neanderthal ways!
 
Did we miss something? Go ahead, tell us the worst pick up line you've ever heard or used in the comments section. 


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