Banking on Everest

  • Manas Chakravarty
  • |
  • Updated: May 26, 2013 01:32 IST

Two mountaineers have set a world record by being the first to use a mobile banking app on Mount Everest….they have successfully traded shares with Breeze Trade and conducted funds transfers with Breeze Banking: Standard Chartered Bank press release, May 23, Nepal.

Climber 1: Ah, Everest. So majestic, so awe-inspiring.

Climber 2: This is phenomenal. Have you checked out the Nikkei crash today?

Climber 1: Eh, what?

Climber 2: The Japanese stock market. It fell a whopping 7.3% today. I checked it out on my mobile banking app.

Climber 1: We'll have to cross that ice-field, it's pock-marked with huge crevasses.

Climber 2: Let me just see what happened to my portfolio. Hmmm…bad…very bad. Do you think this sell-off is a buying opportunity? What? Hey, where the heck are you?

Climber 1: In the crevasse, dangling from the end of the rope. Could you pull me back up please.

Climber 2: Sure, sure. I'll do it just as soon as I sell off these government bonds.

Climber 1: Could you hurry it up, I'm getting strangled here.

Climber 2: Just a minute, I'm waiting for the prices to firm up a bit more. Ah, it's done now. Up you come.

Climber 1: Thanks. Why is it getting dark all of a sudden?

Climber 2: Strange, but not to worry, I've already charged my phone from my solar power charging pack.

Climber 1: I think a blizzard is coming. We should take shelter behind that rock.

Climber 2: This is terrible. I'm sure the damn mobile won't work in a blizzard.

Climber 1: What on earth do you need a mobile for in the middle of this storm?

Climber 2: I had got just the right price for my Unilever stock and was about to hit the Sell button before this blizzard hit. What if the stock has tanked now?

Climber 1: Don't you find this beautiful and exhilarating?

Climber 2: Which one, the tablet or the mobile? Or do you mean the banking app?

Climber 1: I mean the mountain, of course. The calm after the storm, don't you get a kind of Zen feeling?

Climber 2: You mean Yen? Or do you mean the Vietnamese Dong - that's down 20% against the yen. Good time to buy the Dong?

Climber 1: Hey, watch out, AVALANCHE.

Climber 2: I think I'll buy some…….oooops.

Climber 1: Where are you?

Climber 2: Here, buried beneath the snow. And guess what, this is awesome, I have connectivity beneath the snow, I just checked my bank balance. Could you dig me out, please.

Climber 1: Right, there you are, you're fine now. Only a bit more to the summit.

Climber 2: Yes, I can't wait to get to the top to see whether this app works there. Oh hell, the Dow has opened weak.

Climber 1: And here we are, on top of the highest mountain in the world. Just look at that magnificent view.

Climber 2: I will, I will. As soon as I finish transferring these funds.

Manas Chakravarty is Consulting Editor, Mint

Views expressed by the author are personal

 

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