The biggest problem that Three Wise Monkeys will face is that it sounds like a spin-off of Three Wise Men. And it is not. On the plus side, it stands to gain from the fact that neighbourhood rival WTF! has shut down, leaving a horde of thirsty guzzlers without a watering hole.
First-time visitors to this new Khar Road bar, named for the adventurous trio who played Santa to Baby Jesus, will realise that the area doesn’t exactly inspire confidence. The lane, long deemed to be ‘shady’, means the bar will have to make special efforts to keep the sleaze out. There’s no bouncer at the door or entry fee yet, so this seems like a long way ahead.
The dimly-lit décor is a failed attempt at replicating an English tavern. In fact, the wooden paneling from floor to ceiling feels more like a roomy coffin. Not a good start. We do notice wooden kegs suspended from the ceiling, which we’re told hold five litres of beer and can be ordered for Rs1,600. Frat boys’ fantasy fulfilled. The menu features all the usual suspects, with a surprisingly attenuated cocktails section. We chose the Bull Frog (Rs350), a slapdash concoction of tequila, vodka, gin and blue curacao, with a positively medicinal taste, courtesy generous doses of Red Bull. Not recommended for the taste, but works for those seeking a quick high. The house special, 3WM shot (Rs 300), was also sickly sweet, and the alcohol barely made its presence felt. From the mocktails section, we selected Peach Fantasy (Rs 150), which could have sent us into a diabetic coma.
The saccharine fare was saved by the fact that it was accompanied by greasy, but unarguably delicious appetisers. The Sparrow’s Nest (Rs160), fiery chicken chunks sitting in a basket of fried noodles, would make any fan of ‘dirty Chinese food’, proud. The Roasted Pepper Lamb (Rs180) matched it spice-for-spice. The only chink in the armour was the waiter-recommended beer fried potato wedges (Rs140), which were so raw that they had to be replaced with Paneer Cheese Kebabs (Rs150), a strongly favoured dish that wasn’t featured on the menu.
Night outs are turning out to be an expensive proposition in the city. For this very reason, Three Wise Monkeys, which took only Rs1,466 off us that night, is a welcome addition to the nightlife scene.
What: 3 Wise Monkeys
where: The Uni Continental, 3rd Road, Off SV Road, Khar (W)
What’s on the menu: Pastas,salads, Chinese and Continental appetisers