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All’s not well in the love nest

More and more couples are seeking counsellors’ help to iron out marital discord. Here are a few who confessed seeing a counsellor, when differences became too big to ignore in their relationship.

sex and relationships Updated: Nov 28, 2009 19:57 IST
Chetna Joshi Bambroo

Couple'You don’t listen to me ever'; ‘I am not on your priority list’; ‘You don’t respect my folks’...and the list goes on, and stops at a marriage counsellor’s door. More and more couples nowadays are seeing counsellors to alleviate the marital discord. HT City spoke with a few who confessed seeing a counsellor, when differences became too big to ignore in their relationship.

Face off
“I am married for more than a year now. My hubby and I felt the need to see a counsellor when disparity on certain issues between us started taking an ugly shape,” says Monika Nag, 29. She adds, “Seeking help of a counsellor to make your marriage work smoothly is an uncommon thing in my family. So it was a hush-hush thing and no one knows that we are seeing a counsellor.”

Where some are willing enough to take experts’ help to ease out problems, others are a bit reluctant. Deepti Dang, a customer care executive says, “There was a severe problem in our relationship, and I almost went into depression. My husband was not open to the idea of seeing a counsellor, so I went alone. I cried for hours at the counsellor’s clinic. But thankfully, I came home much relaxed and composed.”

Lend an ear
Lifestyle and management expert, Rachana Khanna Singh, says, “Seeing a counsellor is still seen as a taboo by some, but it (counselling) always helps untying the issues that couples hesitate to bring up in front of each other.” Perhaps, counselling is an amicable and decent way to discuss things, as many think they would have otherwise ended up yelling and screaming at each other.

Prerna, a businesswoman, says, “My hubby and I both see a counsellor every week, no matter there’s anything wrong or not. It helps the communication flowing in a very systematic manner.”

A helping hand
It may, at times feel as if you are losing your marriage chit-chats to a third party, but psychiatrist Sanjay Chugh clears these doubts. “No one becomes dependant on a counsellor. Counselling comes as an opinion for anyone who wants to work on a relationship and want to openly, in confidentiality discuss issues,” says Chugh.