Cyrus Broacha to the rescue: Long distance love can work, you know

  • Cyrus Broacha, Hindustan Times
  • Updated: Sep 27, 2015 16:26 IST
TV anchor, theatre personality, comedian, political satirist, columnist and author, Cyrus Broacha is here to help you: He’s got all the dating advice you’ll ever need . (YouTube Grab)

Are you having relationship troubles? Is the long distance bothering you or do you have trust issues? Are you looking for someone to talk your heart out about these problems?

Worry not. So, TV anchor, theatre personality, comedian, political satirist, columnist and author, Cyrus Broacha is here to help you: From navigating relationship trouble to helping your love life go the distance, he’s got all the dating advice you’ll ever need from your first date to something that you can’t find a solution to.

From how to approach your crush to how to handle a break up, shoot your questions to Cyrus and he will answer them.

(Tumbr Photos)

I know a guy since my graduation days. He always had feelings for me. With time, I also started developing feelings for him. A few months back, I confessed my feelings to him. He says he can’t marry me before 2020 because his sisters have to get married first. My family won’t wait till then. What should I do? -- AR

The famous warrior Jebe had the same problem during the conquest of Khwaremzia. He reached Nishapur and didn’t know if the sign of Ecbatana read right or left. The arrow sign confused him. So finally he just plucked at the sign and added it to his quiver of arrows. AR, you are in a similar position, and someone will have to compromise. Either you or his sister or his family or your family sisters. Somebody has to! But again this is just a technical problem. I mean, the question of when it will happen? In the meantime, are you sure he loves you and is the man for you? He seems to be ruled by his head. Normally, that is a good thing, but a little heart wouldn’t hurt, you now. If he’s the one for you, get the families to talk. Chinese food, dim lighting andmaybe a belly dancer or two, and the families may be swayed to compromise. By the way, how many sisters are waiting to get married? Let me warn you that more than seven is a logistical nightmare.

I briefly dated a guy a few months back. We had pretty nice and intense dates together and I thought of him as a sensible and charming man. But I did not expect it to last for long. Few months into it, our conversations reduced. I expected him to talk about it, come to a conclusion and stop it altogether, but he just kept dragging it. He would ignore my requests to talk about the issue, and when I became firm about it, he stopped talking altogether. This really disappointed me. Without a proper closure, I am losing my mind. I want to talk to him, to peacefully resolve the issue with nothing left unsaid, and I don’t want to talk to a man who seems totally uninterested now. Help me. -- SS

Botanist KP Mcallister once poured 3 litres of water into a small bourganvilla plant. Sadly, he forgot the first law of nature, that plants can’t swim. The plant drowned. By trying to request him, badger him and chase him, all you’ll do is drown your plant, SS. Does it really matter why love cools off? The result is that he backed off. Why do we need to know why? The four most common reasons for intimacy to die off are a) bad breath b) communism c) dentures d) not waving arms properly during airport frisking. There are a million more reasons too. So, don’t speculate please. I say you leave him alone. After a passage of time maybe you can ask him what went wrong. If he’s still not forthcoming, please save your self respect and ignore him. What we know less of always keeps us happy. Why do you think religion is so successful?

I have fallen in love with my best friend who lives in Mumbai. I live in Delhi. Even she has confessed her love to me. We are committed now. The only problem between us is the distance. Will it work well considering we won’t be able to meet often? -- MA

According to the book, Loves Labour Regained by IM Sharky ad PS Rushoff over 90% of the battle is won when 2 people love each other. Of course when three people love each other, the equation changes immediately. Living in different cities can be a challenge, but never in human existence has long- distance love had such a good chance as in today’s internet-age. Social networks, SMS, Skype and e-mail. You have so much on your side. Let me also assure you that this Mumbai-Delhi love story has a better chance of surviving than that of a Noida-Gurgaon couple. They meet even less!

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