How to ensure your caring isn't suffocating your partner | sex and relationships | Hindustan Times
Today in New Delhi, India
Jan 21, 2017-Saturday
New Delhi
  • Humidity
  • Wind

How to ensure your caring isn't suffocating your partner

sex and relationships Updated: Feb 04, 2013 15:45 IST
Hindustan Times
Highlight Story


I’m 18 and in love with a girl from my class since seventh grade. She told me that she loved someone else.So I stopped talking to her after that. She used to text, asking me to remain her best friend, but I declined. Then one day she told me she had developed feelings for me and we saw each other for a month. Now she has broke up saying I was acting too possessive. We don’t talk anymore. She’s angry with me these days because one of our mutual friends told her I had used the ‘F’ word. I want her back. Please help me.
The ‘F’ word you say? Let me guess the three worst ‘F’ words in the English language are F for Future, F for Pharmaceutical and F for Fibrosis. So which one is this? Ramesh, she says you were too possessive, that by the way is the worst ‘P’ word, followed by P for pea and P for pee. If you suffocate you kill. If you kill, the other person is no longer in the relationship. So step back and give her some space before you try again. And beware of the ‘M’ word, mutual friend. A mutual friend in today’s financial age is almost as dangerous as a mutual fund.

I’m 19 and I like a girl who is a year older than me. I asked her out 10 months ago but she wanted to wait until we finished our studies and settled with jobs. I’ve been waiting ever since. We are really good friends and almost behave like we are in a relationship when we are out with friends. But at times she behaves like I’m of no importance to her. Is she just playing with me?
You want me to predict the future? Why don’t you ask me something easier, like who will be the President of the US, five years from now? Or if Gadkari will lose any weight by 2017? Normally when a partner asks you to wait, it’s to buy time. It doesn’t look like she serious. You might end up like Advani waiting to become the Prime Minister for 85 years. I say wait for her, but in the meantime, look for other options. Remember, you are actually waiting for her to make up her mind.

I am 17 and a guy from my school recently asked me out. I have always liked him, so I said yes. But then I got to know he was cheating on me me. So I broke up with him. A few days back he asked me out again. I don’t know what to do. I still like him though. Does he really love me?
Miss Confused, you are both young, let’s not turn cynical yet. Everybody knows the right age to turn cynical is 28. And the right age to turn senile is 33. So don’t be too harsh. I say give him a punishment A 100 push-ups a day, wearing lingerie or watching Rajdhani express twice, without a break. That should set him right. Don’t be confused be positive and I don’t mean the blood group.

I am dating my ex boyfriend’s best friend. At times we all hangout together. The other day my current boyfriend got drunk and passed out during a party at my house. I was left in the company of my ex and ended up having sex with him. Should I tell my current boyfriend about it?
Aha, a Greek tragedy. Good news is that, you’re not the first to suffer this situation The bad news is that this is a recipe for disaster. You have three choices a) Continue and enjoy the affections of both till you get caught.
b) Choose one of them.
c) Sail around the world and discover a new continent.
I like the third option, but it’s so hard to get a good boat!