Paying etiquette: Should you split the bill on the first date? | sex and relationships | Hindustan Times
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Paying etiquette: Should you split the bill on the first date?

Should you pay for the first date or split? This study answers the million dollar question.

sex and relationships Updated: Aug 02, 2017 16:27 IST
The subject of who should pay for whom on the first date is evidently still a matter of great fragility.
The subject of who should pay for whom on the first date is evidently still a matter of great fragility.(Shutterstock)

The subject of who should pay for whom on the first date is evidently still a matter of great fragility and comes along with a lot of ifs and buts. According to the most recent edition of Emily Post’s Etiquette, the ‘official’ rule is as follows: ‘for a first date at least, the person who asks for the date should pay unless both parties agree in advance to share expenses,’ reports the Independent.

Not only is this quite possibly the most millennial thing anyone could ever say, it indicates just how blurry the lines of modern dating are.

“I would feel uncomfortable if a guy insisted on paying the whole bill on a first date, especially if it was a lot of money,” a 24-year-old lady, named Samantha said. “It just seems unfair, particularly if there isn’t a second date and a chance for me to balance it out.” But one can surely not carry a calculator all the time, particularly if you’re operating on a “drinks at the bar” basis, in which case there would probably be several bills after every round for you to scratch your unsexy heads over.

“Most of the time a guy offers to get the first round of drinks and then we’d just take it in turns,” Samantha explained. “If they pay a little more on the first date I don’t lose too much sleep over it and will simply get the first round on date two.” For some date folk, not offering to pay at all - not even a tactical ‘reach’ - can be very off putting, particularly so early on.

“I would pay up until date three or four when we know each other better. But I would expect them to offer sincerely every time,” a 22-year-old guy Hugo feels. “If they don’t sort of offer then it’s a massive turn off”. And that’s just drinks. As for dinner? That’s a whole different minefield.

To summarize it all, the report says, leave gender stereotypes to rest, while it’s kind for someone to offer to pay the whole hog, for the sake of ease it’s always better to split or take turns buying rounds, regardless of who asked who or who has a nicer handbag. Save champagne and caviar for another time, or at least until you know their last name!

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