Role play, BDSM, and more: Advice every youngster must have for a great sex life | sex and relationships | Hindustan Times
Today in New Delhi, India
Oct 19, 2017-Thursday
-°C
New Delhi
  • Humidity
    -
  • Wind
    -

Role play, BDSM, and more: Advice every youngster must have for a great sex life

If you think a little bit of foreplay and dirty talk does the trick, think again. Here’s everything you need to know to be a great lover.

sex and relationships Updated: Sep 06, 2017 08:51 IST
Ask your partner what positions and kinks they enjoy.
Ask your partner what positions and kinks they enjoy.(Shutterstock)

“Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there’s nothing exactly like it,” said Amercian actor-comedian WC Fields. We couldn’t agree more. But to have unforgettable sex, you need to have your basics in place (no, what you saw in porn doesn’t count). So, read up before your next hot date.

1) Find out what turns you on

A number of young people are a bit clueless when it comes to what truly gets them going. Spend some alone time exploring and understanding your own body and its erogenous zones. Let your imagination run wild and discover your fantasies. Don’t shy away from experimenting with kinks either. So the next time you’re in bed with your partner, you can let them know exactly what you enjoy, which leads to better, more satisfying sex.

2) Experiment with BDSM

It might feel like a scary idea at first, but BDSM can lead to some memorable orgasms. BDSM (Bondage, Domination, Sadism, Masochism) involves a dominant partner (referred to as ‘dom’) taking complete physical and psychological control of a submissive partner (sub). It’s critical to remember that informed and explicit consent is at the core of BDSM, so both partners need to be on the same page. BDSM often involves use of props like leather whips, handcuffs, and leashes. It’s important that you engage in BDSM with a highly trusted partner who respects you. Also, decide on a safe word beforehand – at any point during intercourse if you feel like stopping, say the safe word. It should act like a signal to stop.

BDSM featured prominently in the movie, 50 Shades of Grey. (Youtube)

3) Give, don’t just receive

A partner who’s selfish in bed can be a total turn off. Be considerate and return the favour, especially when it comes to oral sex. Moreover, each person has their unique preferences. What turned your ex on might not work for your new sex partner. Be considerate and ask them about the positions, kinks and fetishes they are into - even if it’s a one night stand or a quickie. And men, don’t assume sex is over when you climax.

4) Play out your fantasies

Role playing can be fun, imaginative (to the point of bordering on absurd), and a chance to be someone other than yourself. Assume any identity and play out a scenario that might seem illogical or has no chance of happening in the real world. Cop-criminal, doctor-patient and teacher-student are some of the classic pairings but assume any personality that catches your and your partner’s fancy. Don’t worry too much about acting the part or delivering certain pre-decided dialogues – be in the moment and let it carry you away to pleasure.

5) Use protection, always!

Now, this might sound like a kill joy for some but using protection is of utmost importance. Making sure you use a condom not only avoids chances of pregnancy, it also safeguards you against STDs (Sexually Transmitted Disease), which we’re sure you don’t want to end up with.

Follow @htlifeandstyle for more