Cyrus Sahukar, on wearing tight underwears to judge Roadies
Aren’t you too ‘pally’ to be able to judge people?
I hate judging because I came to MTV through a bloody judging thing, and that was harrowing! And I was 19 at that time, and on the first day of my job, people in MTV called me a moron and asked me to serve water. Because of those memories, I was a petrified judge.
So how did you pull it off?
I was just trying to bring out the real personalities of people. But half the time, no one really understood my questions. Like I asked, ‘Who would you choose between your best friend and a Roadies contestant, if they were bitten by a snake and you had anti-venom only for one person?’ One girl said she’d take the anti-venom herself. (Exasperated) I mean, what sort of a moron was she! People are dying in front of her, and she was drinking anti-venom! Another girl said she’ll give the anti-venom to the snake. What does that even mean? The snake had already bitten the people!
How was the first day of judging?
That was in Calcutta, along with Nikhil Chinappa. (Makes a frightened face) And Chinappa gets all angry, yaar. So half the time I was shaking ‘ki kahin Chinappa mujhe na maar de’. And the other half, I was asking them stupid questions that you ask people on your first bad date — What’s your favourite colour? Do you like cockroaches? Do you like gorillas? Because if we are going to Africa, we need to be clear about your feelings towards gorillas.
Did you grill contestants?
No, because I find it hard to be rude to people. (Straight-faced) So I just decided to wear tight underwear, because of which, I walked slowly and that really changed everything. I could also make scary faces because of that, and then the director, Bumpy, told me that I don’t look scary but look like I had a muscle spasm. Because I was doing stupid things like asking people their favourite colour and then breaking a glass to show I’m angry.
Uhh.. can you get angry?
I can and I did, but it was mostly because we were there from 9 am to 4 am, and I would get frustrated by the end of the day. But I’m so lazy that my anger was internal. So my kidneys would fail or I would just lose interest and try to touch my nose with my tongue. Once I tried to box Chinappa because every time I would talk, he’d cut my questions. But I had seen him work out in the gym earlier, so I just spat in his soup when he was not looking. (Seriously) That’s a true story.
But my biggest problem is, I get mean and then I get really sad that I was mean. Bumpy actually took me to the side and said, ‘What are you doing? Behave yourself. It’s a show – these people aren’t really hurt by your comments!’ But I’d just go back to those visuals of me being 19 and people telling me I’m useless. I was so hurt, I still carry the pain.