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Standup comedians give news stories about bizarre crimes a hilarious spin

Here’s what stand-up comedians — Maheep Singh, Papa CJ, Sorabh Pant and Anshu Mor have to say about the recent incidents that made headlines in Delhi-NCR.

gurgaon Updated: Jun 16, 2017 18:42 IST
Naina Arora
Naina Arora
Hindustan Times
Stand-up comedians share their hilarious views on recent news stories that were doing the rounds in Delhi- NCR.

Delhi-NCR is no stranger to bizarre events. More often than not, we hear about incidents involving criminal offences, but with hilarious undertones. From a former Haryana judge firing gunshots at the electricity staff for power cut in his residential area, to a gang that robs people, but first greets them with a gentle ‘Namaste’ — we ask standup comedians to comment on a few such reports. Here’s their witty, hilarious spin to the incidents. Go on, have a laugh!

Upset over power cuts, a retired judge fired gun shots at Haryana electricity staff in Gurgaon

Standup comedian Sorabh Pant reacts on the news report of a Haryana Judge firing gun shots at electricity staff.

It’s raining gun shots quite literally in Gurgaon as a retired Haryana judge, who fired gun shots at electricity staff on Wednesday evening, was sent to the jail after a court remanded him to the judicial custody for 14 days. He reportedly fired gunshots at workers, who were fixing electricity faults at Civil Lines area.

“This is a typical Haryana story. A guy has a gun and somebody uses a tractor to hide behind something. This epitomises all of Gurgaon pretty clearly,” says standup comedian Sorabh Pant when HT City spoke to him about the incident. The comedian finds the incident ‘quite fascinating’. He adds, “What’s up with these judges on their last days after retiring, doing weird things. First the [former] judge from Rajasthan, who said some stuff about peacocks (that they don’t have sex) and then this! This is what happens when you don’t have AC in this weather. People just lose their minds.”

“I’m curious if the tactic worked. I hope it did because specifically that particular state of Haryana, if other people realise that this kind of tactic works, then you’ll see gunshots [fired] all over the place. It seems that’s the only way to get government’s attention in Haryana (laughs). I am glad nobody got injured at the end of the day. I have done some research on guns in Haryana specifically. There is something in place where you could get home delivery of guns in Haryana (laughs),” he says.

20-year-old youth attempts to rob his maternal grandparents,fails miserably

Standup comedian Papa CJ reacts to a news report of an old couple who fought ‘tooth and nail’ to foil grandson’s robbery attempt.

Seeking revenge against his maternal grandparents for not offering financial help for his sister’s wedding, a 20-year-old youth in the city attempted to rob the elderly couple at their home in outer Delhi’s Rohini. The aged couple fought back, raised an alarm leading to the arrest of Rajat and his accomplice.

Standup comedian Papa CJ feels there is a pertinent lesson here. He says, “There is a lesson here for all young people. Apni maa se kabhi panga mat lena. Apne baap se kabhi panga mat lena. Aur apni maa ke maa-baap se tho kabhi bhi panga mat lena.”

Delhi Police busts the ‘Namaste gang’ of Delhi, that would greet people before robbing them

Standup comedian Maheep Singh shares his witty humour on the Namaste Gang of Delhi.

In another incident, a gang of thieves inspired by the character of Bob Biswas in Kahaani (2012) — an insurance agent by day, by night a contract killer, who greeted his targets with a polite ‘Namoshkar’ before shooting them.“This Namaste gang is seemingly inspired by our politicians rather than Bob Biswas’s Kahani,” says, Maheep Singh, adding, “In my opinion they are impressionable youth who are inspired by some of the politicians of our times, who come to the innocent public with folded hands and then take everything and disappear.”

He adds, “They are also custodian of our Indian culture in a way. They are non-violent, polite and they greet everyone including their victims with Namaskar. A small detail like they are going to rob general public shouldn’t come in the way of propagating one’s culture and Sanskaars. They are also probably representatives of demonetisation and digital economy and trying to discourage people from carrying cash. Also they wish to spread the message of ‘sab moh maya hai’ which again is to motivate people to go on the path of Indian philosophy to let go of their worldly things like gold jewellery, expensive watches and other meaningless things, and devote themselves to hard work and simple life.”

A 16-year-old refuses to throw a party for successfully clearing his Class XII examinations

Standup comedian Anshu Mor, shares a comical take on news report of a 16-year-old boy, who was allegedly beaten up by his two friends in Greater Noida on Saturday after he refused to throw a party for successfully clearing his Class XII examinations.

“What a mind-blowing case? Kind of case which even Sherlock Holmes would have found difficult to crack. There are so many variables in this story,” says standup comedian Anshu Mor, where a 16-year-old boy was allegedly beaten up by his two friends in Greater Noida on last Saturday after he refused to throw a party for successfully clearing his Class XII examinations.

The student has been identified as Ashu, a resident of Chiti village in Dankaur. However, the police said the two youths had a personal enmity, which resulted in the scuffle.

Commenting on the incident, Mor says, “While Ashu, the victim claims it was because he refused to give a party, for some reason the police is insisting that it was personal animosity. What was the real reason? Party? Animosity? or Ashu saying ‘mind your language’? I can almost understand the thrashing if it was because a party was refused. Chintu would have already hated the fact that his friend passed XII. Everyone knows, and 3 Idiots (2009) confirmed that nothing hurts more than your friend doing better in exams.”

He asks, “Why is the police insisting on the animosity angle? Do they have a target to achieve this month for cases with animosity? Or do they know something that even Ashu doesn’t know? Wouldn’t Ashu mention that they were enemies in his FIR? Also, why would enemies ask each other for a party. Imagine in the movie Sholay (1975), Dharmendra calling Gabbar and saying, ‘I hate you bro but give me a party na on successful completion of a robbery.The twist, however, is that the story claims that Ashu was beaten up by his two friends. However, only Chintu is named in the report!! Why, what happened to the other one? I have a feeling that the second friend is the key to finding the answer, which clearly the world is dying to know now because global warming can wait!.”

First Published: Jun 16, 2017 18:29 IST