The Brunch round-up: The week and how it made us feel

Researchers in Taiwan have spent time, effort and money to determine that childhood myopia, or nearsightedness, can be prevented if *drumroll please* the child spends more time outdoors. An obvious catchall we didn’t need scientists for. Nobody tell Taylor Swift or Tiger Woods that all that money spent on LASIK could have so easily been avoided.

Because social-media marketers clearly don’t read. Brunch got invited to an album-launch event. Only it was hashtagged #analbumparty. This is worse than the #whoremembers tag that got trolled instead of celebrating nostalgia. It’s Now Here is routinely read as It’s Nowhere. One carmaker is determined that its Insta stays @volkswagenitalia. Use_underscore, maybe?

AP Dhillon: First of a Kind (2023), follows the musician’s career over four episodes without the rags-to-riches narrative about the Jatt boy from Gurdaspur, whose family send him to Canada to work. It takes the human approach. Dhillon, 22, struggling to speak English and discovering hip-hop. It ignores Punjabi bling and lets the beats do the talking. And it bravely acknowledges the late Sidhu Moosewala, without whom the discussion is incomplete.

@jon_newsome86 has blessed our timelines with Redneck Word of The Day. Juicing: “If I toldja ya had a nice voice, would juicing for me?”. @nicholasflannery has turned playing a Rich White Housewife (trench, wine, lonely, lowkey drama) into an art form. Please join forces and give us the all-American crossover we need.

Remember how we all ditched plastic straws for paper ones overnight to save the turtles or something? Research, out this month, suggests that paper versions are loaded with long-lasting chemicals connected to human health issues and may not be better for the environment than plastic versions. Climate change isn’t about paper or plastic anymore, guys. It’s about ditching both and living lighter.

That Vogue India would do a cover with the cast of The Archies is no surprise. The movie is full of nepo babies hoping to be called something else eventually. What’s baffling is why Riverdale life looks so boring. Gingham, plaid and checks. No joy. No pulse. They look like they were fired from the Scooby-Doo set.