If you find this title insane, don’t go any further because what is about to unfold here is not for the weak-hearted. Yes, you can put bananas, cockroaches and grandma’s prayers in a sentence. There are some beings who can be seen eating a banana while looking at a cockroach in a corner and simultaneously shaking a leg to grandma’s prayers.
Welcome to the world of toddlers. A world which is quite inexplicable and ever pepped up to throw a drama in a nick of time any moment, irrespective of place, time and parents’ dying energy reserves.
A toddler’s favourite word is “no”. “What do you want for lunch?” She answers, “No!” Do you want to try eating this red fruit?” “No.” My husband and I are so used to hearing her say no that it’s almost some sort of chant perceived to keep the elders’ sanity intact and hearts relaxed. From gyrating to grandma’s prayers to fiddling with grandpa’s walking sticks, nursery rhymes and toys have taken serious offence. Life is brimming with such unusual interludes and well, we signed up for this vision by choice.
Having a toddler in the house makes every day feel like a festival and hullabaloo too, at times. Preparing new dishes every day to satiate her moody palate to buying a new set of clothes every three months, it is ensured that the show remains on. From demanding the sight of a dead cockroach swept under the bed mistakenly by dad to dancing to ‘incy wincy spider’ every time a spider appears on the television screen, Animal Planet to be precise, or in her books, the demands have to be fulfilled without much ado. You just have to keep looking for the cue and hop into action with lightning speed.
{{/usCountry}}Having a toddler in the house makes every day feel like a festival and hullabaloo too, at times. Preparing new dishes every day to satiate her moody palate to buying a new set of clothes every three months, it is ensured that the show remains on. From demanding the sight of a dead cockroach swept under the bed mistakenly by dad to dancing to ‘incy wincy spider’ every time a spider appears on the television screen, Animal Planet to be precise, or in her books, the demands have to be fulfilled without much ado. You just have to keep looking for the cue and hop into action with lightning speed.
{{/usCountry}}From slung low to gung-ho, the moods are many. While we, as parents, have no option to be laid back and be sighing for microseconds, yet, we end up witnessing a different master stroke altogether. Lo and behold, the kid is spotted standing on a chair almost at the verge of getting seriously injured. We understand it gives her a fresh and heightened perspective of the surroundings, but we get surprised by fear and sudden panic attacks. The thrilling endeavour is soon brought back to the ground with her shrieks and screams, of course.
If being this adventurous isn’t enough, we watch a tryst with glass bottles, eggs, utensils and all that is fragile and breakable in the kitchen. Don’t get me started on how well my baby-led weaning journey is going on because that is one sore wound owing to a high-spirited child and fatigued parents.
This is our everyday humdrum and the house turns into a deserted hollow building when the kid is asleep because any unwanted sound would unleash the inner demon pounding inside us, the parents. It is this demon that is kept cajoled and coaxed with the chant we love the most, “This too shall pass. Amen.” Until then, we occupy ourselves reading her books, exploring new games, and gyrating to her jingles dotingly. It’s time to put Sia’s “Cheap Thrills” on loop. Ciao! alpana193@gmail.com
The writer is an assistant professor in English at Government College, Jatauli Haily Mandi, Gurugram