The Brunch round-up: The week and how it made us feel

The new signifier of wealth? Not a Lamborghini, a Labubu doll. A what? Those odd-looking figures that Rihanna and Ananya Panday posed with, causing sales to skyrocket. OK, we understood the Stanley cup obsession. But these dolls? They’re part-bunny, part-monkey, part-sprite. Imagine waking up and seeing that too-wide smile and those unblinking eyes. Creepy much?

Eric Stonestreet (campy Cam from Modern Family), is playing a serial killer in Dexter: Resurrection. How? Why? The man is peak teddy-bear energy, no? Don’t be fooled by his cuddly act. Remember how he played Fizbo, the unhinged clown, and threatened to twist a guy into a balloon animal? Oh, there’s a dark side.

It’s one thing to hum Levitating and work out which bits are homage-slash-plagiarism. It’s another to discover her 2022-2023 podcast, At Your Service. For every episode with a celeb (Tim Cook, Billie Eilish, Dita Von Teese), she has one with a drug-policy reformer, a psychotherapist and a civil-rights leader. Girl’s got range!

All this week, we’ve been obsessed with videos of people mixing leftover lip gloss to create one jumbo lippie. Yes to playing Frankenstein. No to waste. Use half-finished tubes,not new ones, people. You won’t finish the franken-gloss either. When the excitement ends, use it as a highlighter, brow gel, and to tame your baby hair.

Wake up, babe. A new Hadid sister just dropped. Bella and Gigi Hadid have made public that they have a 23-year-old half-sister, Aydan Nix. She’s a fashion influencer and aspiring designer. This is giving Charlie’s Angels, but make it fashion. But wait. Is she a horse girl like her sisters? That’s all we want to know.

Tinder is planning to roll out a height filter, allowing women to screen men according to how tall they are. Shorties fear they’ll be filtered out. But Tall™ is not what women want in the first place. How about a filter for men who are creepy, disloyal, and messy? Tinder, as usual, cares more about bro code than actual code.

So much Beckham family drama, so little time. We knew that ma-in-law Victoria wasn’t vibing with Brooklyn’s wife Nicola Peltz. Now, Brooklyn’s post says he’d always choose his wife, who’s his “whole world”. Awww. His brother Cruz, however, posted that he’ll always love his family. Ooh, boundaries and battle lines! And balls!

Denmark is ending its 400-year-old postal service, PostNord Denmark. You know what this means: You have until the end of the year to send your most epic postcards from the country. Send your BFFs a graphic sketch. Send your crush a limerick. Send your ex-boss a stinker. What are they gonna do, send it back?