In sailor Nethra Kumanan’s mind, returning with a bronze medal from the Hangzhou Asian Games three years ago was probably the worst-case scenario considering that she had gone as one of the favourites. She finished fourth.
As the first (and till date only) Indian woman sailor to qualify for and compete at the Olympics, Nethra had been the pathbreaker for women's sailing in the country. Yet personal success at the Asian Games – she was 5th in 2018 and 7th in 2014 – eluded the seasoned sailor.
Having a fourth crack at it, it wasn't quite desperation, but a sense of eagerness.
Deep Dive
How did Nethra Kumanan's liberating approach impact her performance at the Asian Games?
What past experiences influenced Nethra Kumanan's mindset heading into the Asian Games?
What were Nethra Kumanan's training priorities before the Asian Games?
"I want to do this just for myself, rather than having to prove anything to anyone," Nethra told HT before leaving for the Asian Games. "It's a more liberating way of approaching this one."
That liberating approach rewarded her with an Asian Games medal, at long last – a bronze in the women's dinghy event on Friday.
"I used to think pressure is a privilege, which is true," said the 29-year-old from Chennai. "But I realised it may not always work for me. I'm someone who hasn't dealt with result-oriented pressure very well. It made me freeze in important moments. It was then a process of accepting who you are as an athlete and a competitor.
{{/usCountry}}"I used to think pressure is a privilege, which is true," said the 29-year-old from Chennai. "But I realised it may not always work for me. I'm someone who hasn't dealt with result-oriented pressure very well. It made me freeze in important moments. It was then a process of accepting who you are as an athlete and a competitor.
{{/usCountry}}“I guess I've learnt that over the past 8-10 years of being a decent sailor. It's one of those things that you have to fail at the important moments to be able to learn. I've been privileged enough to keep fighting for it."
That failure in Hangzhou, coming two years after breaking the glass ceiling for Indian sailing at the Olympics, stung. "Quite a lot," the multiple-time Asian Championships medallist said. "That one was a hard pill to swallow. As a sailor, when I'm at my lowest is when I pick myself back up and have my best results."
Training at the Spanish island of Gran Canaria, Nethra put in a shift over the winter. She also had the opportunity to compete and train for a month in July in Los Angeles, at the same venue where the Olympics will be held in two years. Results were not quite as expected but a break before the Asian Games came at the right time.
"The Asian Games was my priority for some time now, since the last Olympics," she said.
Since the last Olympics, she has also made a conscious decision to shut out all the outside noise. It's easier said than done, but her experience competing in a fourth Asian Games helped. As did plenty of visualisation work and conversations with her psychologist when she was not sailing before heading to Japan.
"It was about making sure that I quiet the noise for myself, and just focus on the sport and in executing my strengths," she said.
All Nethra wanted from this Asian Games was to come out of it knowing she gave it her all. “Which wasn't the case at all the last time."
She also came out of it with a first Asian Games medal.