Can you experience true love more than once, or is it meant to happen just once?

Falling in love is the most beautiful chaos you will ever feel. But can it happen more than once, or does the heart only choose once?

Is love meant to happen once, or can it find us more than once? There are many theories that try to define love, yet there is surprisingly little conversation about how often we truly fall in love. Popular Indian author Ravindra Singh touched on this very question through his book Can Love Happen Twice?

‘Hum ek baar jeete hain, ek baar marte hain, shaadi bhi ek baar hoti hai, aur pyaar ek hi baar hota hai,’ remains one of the most iconic lines that every filmy buff has grown up hearing and believing. But does it hold relevance, especially in today’s modern world of dating? That being said, there is a theory that says we fall in love three times in a lifetime.

“I would argue that love has no limits, but is made of many layers,” said Dr Aditi. “As we go through different stages in life, we don't simply fall for different individuals; we fall in love with different people,” Aditi added.

Layers of love

Dr Aditi explains that in our youth, love is very fiery, passionate, and is almost all-consuming. It is exciting, and there is yearning, and at times, it can be accompanied by fear of losing that love. But as we age, and life humbles us, we understand more, and love transforms. It becomes quieter, steadier, and definitely more profound.

In our youth, love is very fiery, passionate, and is almost all-consuming.

Psychologist perspective on falling in love again

Dr Aditi, from a psychologist's perspective, highlights that falling in love again is not a sign of failure, quite the contrary. It is a sign of resilience from the heart. It shows that we are still open and willing to fall in love again, and that is a very human trait.

She added that the more love we experience, the more we gain wisdom, and the better we understand our emotional needs and where to set boundaries. When we are older, we tend to appreciate safety, respect, and mutual understanding more than passion and intensity. We value true connection more than just chemistry. Mature love is about being truly seen and accepted by someone else. It is not about being completed by someone else. It is emotional depth and awareness, not impulse.

Mature love is about being truly seen and accepted by someone else.

Dr Aditi concluded that there is no fixed number of times someone can fall in love. It is not the capacity to love that changes, but the way we experience and hold love. Ultimately, love is not measured by how frequent it is, but how real and meaningful it is each time it happens.