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No shade: Why do romcoms love the desi girl-white guy trope?

The brown girl meets white saviour storyline is overdone and outdated. The real interracial diversity is on Insta Reels

Updated on: May 30, 2025 05:21 PM IST
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Who’s the hottest girl in the world? White guys seem to think it’s desi girls. At least, that’s what romcoms will have you believe. Most plots are about ambitious-but-lowkey-insecure Brown women who land gorgeous rich White guys. Is this the best we can do in a globalised world?

Paxton and Devi’s romance in Never Have I Ever feels cringe and white-saviour coded.
Paxton and Devi’s romance in Never Have I Ever feels cringe and white-saviour coded.

Mindy Kaling is notorious for milking this specific pairing. When the Netflix show Never Have I Ever (2020- 2023) came out, fans called it “a win for Brown girl representation”. In one scene, Paxton, rippling over with muscles and pheromones, told pyjama-clad Devi that she had “the beauty of Priyanka Chopra”. Why must love be so cringey and white saviour-coded?

In One Day, the series based on the bestselling David Nicholls book, Emma is Brown, hardworking, earnest and also consciously less hot than laidback, rich White Dexter. It’s clear who has the power in their on-and-off relationship. And don’t get us started on the Sharmas of Bridgerton.

From Bridgerton to Picture This, Simone Ashley always gets paired with white guys.

Stand-up comedian Akaash Singh said it best in his comedy podcast, Flagrant: “These are Brown people TV shows for White people”.

Meanwhile, in Reel – and real life – non-White boyfriends and husbands are doing their homework, both in terms of compliments and culture. We’ve all gone aww over Korean BF Donnie and Gujju GF Radhika’s Insta (@KemchhoKimchi). We love that he attempts to learn Gujarati (Kemcho? Majama), cooks undhiyu, and attends Prateek Kuhad concerts with her. Content creator Kalpa (@ChennaiToLagos) tries to make sense of Yoruba phrases; her Nigerian husband, Tòmídé, calls her his Indian queen and gets his parents to try South Indian food. Influencer Tushita Hariharan’s (@Tushita.H) Jamaican husband Brendan mimics – and nails – her mother’s Indianisms (“Why are you sitting on my head?”)

Reels have way more diversity than romcoms, like Tushita and her Jamaican husband Brendan. (Instagram/@Tushita.H)

Real-life mixed couples are what romcoms should be aiming for. It’s largely free of Colonial obsessions with exotica. Both partners seem equally crazy. Each makes fun of the other’s culture. The only challenge seems to be dealing with disgruntled incels in the comments – people who can’t land an Indian partner, let alone a foreign one.

Why is Hollywood sleeping on these interracial love stories? Mississippi Masala – which came out in 1991, BTW – can’t be our only frame of reference?

It’s time to update the romcom fantasy. Give Brown women Black and Asian heroes. Show us mixed couples arguing whether biryani is better than jollof rice or whether the male lead looks best in a sherwani or a hanbok. #SorryNotSorry

From HT Brunch, May 31, 2025

Follow us on www.instagram.com/htbrunch

 
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