At a pre-lockdown get-together, a dear uncle asked me to share ideas on positive thinking. He might have found asking me worthwhile, since I have a background in psychology. However, positive thinking, in a nutshell, is actually nothing more than looking at a glass half full. But, when it comes to its real-life applications, we struggle, we stumble, and we strive. It seems to elude most of us. Or, so we think.
The moment the lady of the house gets up at 6 am to prepare breakfast and tiffin boxes, she, without saying or realising so, is presuming it to be a normal day with her loved ones’ routines proceeding in a predictable manner. She is presuming structure and safety. Isn’t that positive thinking? And she has role(s) throughout these routines, that, she’ll be trying to do full justice to. That’s the application part.
Doesn’t getting treated by an ophthalmologist for cataract after not being able to read a newspaper’s fine print translate to hope (and action taken) for regularity and continuity – something that’s indicative of optimism?
Even when we admonish our younger ones for not studying: Doesn’t the energy we expend reflect the dreams and desires we harbour for our progeny?
Life, with its daily mundane nature itself, is positive thinking.
{{/usCountry}}Life, with its daily mundane nature itself, is positive thinking.
{{/usCountry}}BEGINNING OF A JOURNEY
Yes, we do need to cultivate and train our minds further in this art, but that will remain only a remote possibility till this humdrum positive thinking is understood and assimilated. From there, the real journey will begin. And once that beginning is made, there’s no looking back.
There can be multitude theories and techniques, both fancy and plain, for developing a positive mindset. Less of complaining. Yes! Gratitude journaling. Yes! Expecting good things. Yes! Yoga. Yes! Reframing challenges with terminology of opportunities. Yes!
All the same, optimism doesn’t translate to being happy all the time. A positive thinker has a cent percent right to have bad days, low mood, and even irritability. But the conviction with which efforts will be put into overcoming these states of mind will make a difference. A Facebook post once read, “We think that the point is to pass the test or overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don’t really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. It’s just like that, the healing comes from letting there be room for all this to happen; room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy.” Never have words struck home more.
TO BE RESILIENT, FLEXIBLE
Especially in these days of lockdown, it’s the hope of a return to normalcy that is sustaining us. We are all counting days as we lovingly allow the pet to lick our hands. We are anticipating a healthier environment once corona disappears, as we bask in the playfulness of the toddlers at home. We are helping loved ones kill monotony by performing a group-dance on old musical numbers within the family. We are displaying faith as we play antakshari to overcome drudgery. These times are also presenting chances to us for building resilience and flexibility. That is positive thinking.
So, let’s breathe, and keep working to clear the roadblocks in the journey of life. But, let’s not forget to smile as we do this. Also, let us also keep attempting to put smiles on others’ faces. Borrowing a few lines from the Internet: “Chalo chupke se rakh aatey hain, khushhaali unke sirhaane mein, jinhein arsa beet gaya hai, khulkar muskuraaey huey (Come, let us quietly leave happiness/prosperity by their bedside – those who for ages have not smiled).”
It is indeed in giving that we receive. So, let’s deliver an upbeat outlook.
(The author is assistant professor (psychology) at Rajiv Gandhi Government College, Saha, Ambala)