A kinder, gentler experience awaits the loutish reveler this New Year eve. The Gurgaon police has issued instructions that pub bouncers must use ‘non-violent’ means to deal with unruly guests.
Apparently, pepper spray is one such non-violent method. Now we can quite imagine the scenario. As the drunken slob begins to molest women guests, even fire a few celebratory shots, the bouncer approaches. “Excuse me sir, your hands seem to have accidentally wandered and are now resting on this lady’s personage. We are sure you didn’t mean it. And, oh, how nice, you have a Smith and Wesson as a fashion accessory. Now, may we see you to the door so that you can go home and catch 40 winks?” We are certain that your common and garden reveler will see the logic of this and fade away quietly. En route, he might break a few things, call his family and pull out the fashion accessory to show people what a good sport he is.
Silly us, we thought that bouncers were meant to haul you out by the scruff of your neck and fling you into the cold night air outside if you didn’t mind your ps and qs. Which was why in the old days, the bouncer was about three feet taller than you and at least 50 kg heavier. Now, we guess such physical attributes are not required but a knowledge of breathing techniques to calm the offender and a soothing Deepak Chopraish monotone on loving yourself and your fellow travellers. But we, the old-fashioned, still maintain that we’d feel a lot better if we were to confront a Charles Bronson lookalike at the door of a pub than some fey lisping soul. We are all for the smack of good pub management and the louder the smack the better.
{{/usCountry}}Silly us, we thought that bouncers were meant to haul you out by the scruff of your neck and fling you into the cold night air outside if you didn’t mind your ps and qs. Which was why in the old days, the bouncer was about three feet taller than you and at least 50 kg heavier. Now, we guess such physical attributes are not required but a knowledge of breathing techniques to calm the offender and a soothing Deepak Chopraish monotone on loving yourself and your fellow travellers. But we, the old-fashioned, still maintain that we’d feel a lot better if we were to confront a Charles Bronson lookalike at the door of a pub than some fey lisping soul. We are all for the smack of good pub management and the louder the smack the better.
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